me_2_euu

Farewell!

2008-05-12T20:56:00.003+07:00

To everyone who has been reading my blog regularly,

ONE BIG THANK YOU TO ALL!

But sadly, I'm closing down this bloggie which had stayed with me for nearly 2 years.

I wanna start afresh and lead a different life now!

However, I wouldn't delete this blog, I'll leave it here for you ppl to TAG most importantly,

but I dun tink many will. Hahas.

Please go to my LIVEJOURNAL which I've just set up not long ago.

There isn't any board for tagging but please do drop some comments if my vocab sucks or wadever!

Hahas.

I didnt get to reach 200 posts for this blog which is a pity, boohoohoo!

But I do hope my livejournal makes it to a 200, by next yr May.

Do visit my livejournal and if u wanna relink, u're most welcomed!

http://acupofearlgrey.livejournal.com/

P.S: I had a cup of eaarl grey this afternoon, it tasted great! (:

Stress accumulating

2008-04-30T23:08:00.003+07:00

Today is stupid LABOUR DAY.
And it means ''more labour" for me, and some of my frens.
Group assignments, individual works.....
Worse still, DEADLINES of these assignments!
I am feeling brain dead and physical tired.
I am sick; down with cough and sore throat.
Some more I have to sing on Saturday for CHS Orientation Prog.
Haix, this is so tiring.

I am fed up with JAMS at customs and thefts dat occured to me for d past 2 mths.
2 wallets and 1 handphone STOLEN within 2 mths.
I mearly wanted to bang my head onto the wall.
Unlucky or careless?!
Hahas, I dun wanna analyse it.
4 hours are being wasted everyday due to long journeys to customs.
Just imagine how much homework I can do in these 4 hrs,
Excluding the time for slacking.
CCA ended at 9 yesterday, reached home at 11.30pm.
I am so tired of this, waste time and energy.
I wanna settle at a place with reasonable rent price,
Is dat so difficult?
I feel like dropping school right now,
I wanna earn money....

Phone bills are like???? additional charges for f*cking subscriptions
when I was told that there were FREE for a month!
It's only 2 wks from the day I signed this line.
Wadever, I am just down with no luck.
Cheque was sent back due to alternation, which idiotically needs sinature?!
Briefing updates had passed a long time ago, and I jus gotten the letter to inform.
Wad the.....
The letters were sent to my uncle's hse which is in Spore lah.
So accumulate letters will be like, OVERDUE?
But something for me to be happy is,
I've received money for my work commission FINALLY!
It isn't a huge sum but I need a new pair of sports shoes now.

I am going insane, seriously.
Money, time and energy wasted.
In one way or another.
Brain-dead and thére's nth I could do abt it.
Free writing; I RAN OUT OF IDEAS!
Assignments; GRP MEMBERS CANT COORDINATE MEETING TIMES!
Discussion boards; I HATE GIVING COMMENTS ON LESSONS LEARNT!
Exams; UNKNOWN DATES AND UNPREPARED!
School vacations; WORK , ASSIGNMENTS AND REVISION!

By the way, I jus knew that Hockey is having a Sentosa outing today!
I am interested to go, cos I wanna know more seniors.
But I cant get myself out of bed once I sleep, later.
Assignments are on due, work has to be done asap.
No time to spare, no time to play.
Days are passing so fast like hours.
I cant imagine how fast this unlucky year is going to end.
I wish I hav more than 24 hours a day!
I am dozing off, see ya!

School life

2008-04-27T11:15:00.002+07:00

2 weeks of school had ended.
Time really flies...
My classmates are nice ppl, but I'm still trying to find true frens from within...
Assignments and grp works are on due, conflicts may arise...
There are some of them who were being gossiped and bad-mouthed...
Well, I'll just listen and pretend that I know nothing.
It's best not to be involved in these kind of stuff....
There isn't much unique or special in my class, that's from my opinion.
I like CCAs more, I've joined hockey and photography club.
Training hours are long but fun.
Friends made there are much nicer ppl than classmates.
More common topics to discuss on and less conflicts.
I wanna save money to buy a camera!
I'm starting to love photography, although there are so many foreign terms which I dun really understand...
I hope this will be my long term hobby from now, since I've quitted TAS.
I am trying to let go of some old hobbies and habits.
I'll start afresh and create a better me in the future.
Sorry if I seldom update this blog, as I've opened another blog which I written in chinese.
www.threcipeofdream.multiply.com
Please visit and comments are most welcomed!
I think that's all, (i'm a boring person!)

First day of school

2008-04-14T12:17:00.002+07:00

Yeah, the first day of school hasn't even ended and here I am, blogging about my first experience in Poly.
I woke up half an hour early today, 4.30am!
As u all know, Monday morning is usually the busiest moment at the custom.
As usual, I can't get on to any bus and walked along th stupid long causeway.
Sweating like no one's business, lol.
I was so damn afraid that I'll be late cos my first lesson starts at 8am.
I took the shuttle bus at Interchange and met Millison, my ex-choir senior!
Chatted a little and realised the trip to school was quite short.
Reachd school at around 7.35am and walked sowly to my classroom.
The teacher came late cos she cant find the classroom.
Guess who my teacher is?

Yeah, she is an actress in Mediacorp, acting once as a principal in a chinese idioms show.
..Liu Xiao Zhang...
Isn't that quite familiar?
She is Shi Suen Laoshi!
Her chinese is perfectly and I totally loved her lesson!
I'm so glad to be her student!
My tutorial class is as exciting.
Although some were self-highing, overall, the atmoshpere was quite nice.
Hope I can get to know more friend in my tutorial!
I'm going to watch a Chinese Drama at the NLB.
It's for lesson purposes, hope it's going to be exciting.
First day of school, assignments are already given.
But it's due after 2 weeks.
hahas.
Later going to CCA fiesta, I wan to see which ccas to join!
Abit sian now, slacking at library.

HMS FOC

2008-04-12T20:17:00.002+07:00

The weather nowadays is very unpredictable...
People are getting sick,
and I had an ultra big ulcer and my lips looks swollen...
Back from HMS FOC.
Quite a fun camp indeed.
But halfway, I contracted some germs and became sick.
Fever and feeling cold inside and hot on the outside.
Nearly fainted when we were taking a whole school photo at the sports track.
I am still feeling a little feverish and I didn't went to practice today and not going for tml's.
Have to rest well before school starts on Monday.
Am looking forward to sch start.
There are chio-bus in my course, (i'm not a les!)
And less than 10 guys, (and they are not macho! sian..)
Wonder how the lectures and tutorials are going to be like...
Exciting?! Tedious?! Boring?!
Well, let's wait and see.....

Been pondering over CCAs to join...
Photography is a sure one, the second...
may be Concert Band, or a Sports one.
Checked out the training durations...
Some were quite tedious, such as Track & Field, 3 prac a week lor...
Not forgeting I still have Jap lesson to take once per week.
Should be super busy and I still haven found a place to stay.
I hate travelling but no choice at this period of time...
Renting prices are rising and I am not working already.
Haix...

Went back to Rs early this morning to receive prize at the Speech Day.
Only a stupid trophy, I was expecting a vouncher of $10 value, at the very least.
Nevermind lah, at least I get to see my fellow ex-classmates and chatted with some teachers.
Have to go baack in May again to get my testimonial.
The JC ppl seemed to be very stressed out by the tedious tons of homeworks and boring lectures...
Hope I can survived in Poly, if not there's no way for me to excel.
Must mug hard and play less le..
But the time and effort that is infused will be worthwhile.
I hope to fulfill my dream and get the job I always wanted.
Maybe I'll further studies in China! hahas.
If there is a chance lah, but I'll grab it no matter what.
That's all, I supposed.
Look forward to opening a new blog!

The end of torture

2008-04-04T21:36:00.002+07:00

Sorry for not updating for more than 2 weeks!
I've busy with work and my home computer has some technical problem..
So I'm using my laptop now..hahas...
Today is the last day of work...
I kinda miss the kids actually...
Bought snacks for two kids whom I quite adore...
I'm not being discriminating!
But luck was not with me, both didn't come...
So the snacks are still with me now...
But overall, i kinda of enjoy working there,
although my boss can be abit stern and strict towards our working attitude,
she's a totally kind and sociable lady...
She had bought me school bag, wallet and even famous dishes guidebook in Msia...
How sweet of her...
Ms tan and Sun laoda are also kind souls!
Not forgeting auntie!
She likes to nag alot and sometimes curse me for nothing...hahahs..
I've learnt and receive alot from work...
It was much more better than standing at shopping centres and faking smiles...
I do hope they will be perfectly fine with kid-handling and lecturings...
Take care, everyone at DSCC!

Tml going out with my girls!
Finally.....
Cos I was working and the three hunkies always go out without me...
Sad...
But tml I hope i can enjoy myself as much as possible!
Next week is the orientation camp and I haven pack a thing...
But I am excited to find out how's poly life going to be!
Hope my timetable isn't as tedious, or else I'll be dead...
Dunno wad more else to say, so bye bye!

Enrolment period

2008-03-17T08:26:00.002+07:00

Hi, it's been quite a while since I last updated.
Now here I am, in Ngee Ann Poly.
Hahas....
I was supposed to install Chinese Plus into my laptop but they said no need, so here I am sitting here to post loh...
Took a half day leave from work, quite free and easy now...
Seriously, I think NP is very efficient in the process of enrolment...
I was worried about all the tedious steps when buying laptop and appling for hire purchase...
But it turns out that things were simple and fast.
I was pleased and contented.
There were people to help me with laptop stuffs and installation.
A IT noob like me can really go crazy with all the softwares and installations...hahas
I spent one hour in the midnight yesterday to reformat my laptop cos I dunno what happened to it when I fell asleep halfway thru...
I just hate complicated stuffs like these....
Anyways, I've signed up to learn Japanese in NP...
Hope it'll be a fruitful and enjoyable learning experience for me...
Hasn't been seeing my girls for awhile le, except for Yixin cos of work issues...
And I haven't been going out with friends to relax...
After I quit on 7 Apr, there'll be a HMS camp for me on the 9th.
No rest, no shopping time...
But it feels good to be busy..
Oh ya, one more thing...
My laptop is damn heavy de lor!
2.46kg i supposed...
My shoulders cant sustain too long upon the weight...
If I got to bring it to school everyday,
I believe I'll grow shorter and shorter...
Cry....
Nvm, I will get over with it and live my poly happily and excitingly...
Emm, it sounds so 'primary-school'....
Wadever it is, wish me good luck!

I HATE PICKPOCKETS!

2008-03-09T20:31:00.002+07:00

Well, I wanna apologise to my girls for backing out on today's outing.
Cos I seriously dun wanna spend anymore money on wants.
And I'm kinda regretted my stupid decision.
Guess what, I LOST MY DAMN PRETTY WALLET TODAY!
I went to singing practice as for normal in the morning,
Then we were supposed to have extra practice in the noon till 4pm.
But teacher had something urgent to attend to,
So we decided to catch a movie at Tebrau Jusco.
Well, the hopping lot was packed peeps...loads of them...
We went to queue the damn long queue to buy tickets,
And when we reached the counter, we realised we still haven choose what to watch.
I wanted to watch Step Up 2 but the show was at 7pm.
So 10,000BC was filling out very fast,
We watched The Spiderwick Chronicles which was at 5.30pm.
It was about 1 and a half hours before the show starts after we bought tickets.
So we went to Harris (it's popular actually.) bookstore to browse thru books.
I was too engrossed in the make-up and styling books that I dun even realised my wallet had been pickpocketed.
It was when I took out my bottle to have a sip then I felt something amiss.
Searched, but my bag was too small to look again.
Gone means that it was really gone.
But the weird thing was my handphone was still intact.
Actually, there was only 20 dollars and Malaysia IC inside the wallet which Ler Ler gave me for my bdae.
And it's THE ONLY BDAE PRESENT I"VE RECEIVED THIS DAMN YEAR!
I thought I was going to break down.
Cos besides the two valuables, the other two " LUCKY CHARMS " of mine were inside too.
I was damn upset by the whole incident, went to make a report and asked around the info counter.
One of the 'lucky charm' has been with me for 5 years long!
I was sad, very very sad about it.
I dun feel anything for my money and IC, instead I wished I could make new IC cos
my photo for that damn IC was super ugly.
I had no mood to eat dinner even.
However, the movie was great!
I loved fantasy movies sometimes....
The movie sort of helped me to forget about the incident but I was still quite worried abt it.
I just hoped the pickpocket can have some integrity to return my IC and lucky charms.
If that jerk wans to take my money, by all means, take it and leave my wallet!
I wan my LUCKY CHARMS back!
AHHH!

WRATH

2008-03-08T21:33:00.002+07:00

I'm feeling very outraged at this moment.
I hate them, I just hate them.
Maybe I hate myself too, I don't know.
I hope my life can be better when I start school.
I am tired of life now.
Work and singing.
Tedious and stressful.
Kids are a disaster!
I'm tired of nagging and being patient.
I'm not into teaching but still, I am a teacher.
I need to display my utmost patience to those kids and the boss.
I am feeling tired, seriously.
But I chose this path so might as well do my best.

I have decided to start afresh when school starts.
- New clean blog, wordpress or multiply ( although this blog doesnt even reach a 200 post... )
- Blog will be written in chinese, and most probably wouldn't be publicised...
- New email address, will re-add contacts.
- New friendster account? maybe...
- New laptop, hopefully.
- New hairstyle if I can manage to hunt for a superb hairdresser with reasonable price.
- New attitude and character, maybe... but it's hard to change but I'll try for a better me!
- Study hard! I wanna get scholarship!
- I wanna work in a singing cafe as a singing waitress. Is there any cafe or restaurant that suits this requirements?
- Find the dreams of mine and strive hard towards them!
- Make myself popular?! maybe it's just impossible to myself stand out of the crowd...
- *in additional, I am tinkin of taking up Japanese!
That's all I could think of at this moment...

Maybe this blog will be closed down or totally ignored...
I have nothing to write anymore...
No inspiration to continue this indescribable blog of mine...
10 days a tag...
Wow, I can break the least popular blog record ever...
hahas...
But i'm still glad some peeps still read my idiotic blog,
Listening to my blabbering and nonsensical sayings....
Thanks....
I'm currently into jazz now...
Loved jazzy songs...
Diana Krall, Corrinne Bailey Rae, 小野丽莎 the Jap jazz singer...
These are a few I really loved...
Oh ya, I am thinking of taking up Japanese in Poly...
I dun intend to play or go clubbing even if i'm 18 now.
I'll just stay simple and boring.
Even if I'll bore to death...
Life isn't interesting, it's you who make it interesting.
But i dun feel interesting...
Not at all.

Lesser words

2008-03-02T20:19:00.001+07:00

MY WHITE CHOCOLATE BLONDIE @ SWESENS!

I doubt that I will still continue to update...
I am just lazy and lost of words...
Many peeps are closing down their blogs due to 'A' levels and school stress or wadever it is.
So i just find it meaningless to write so much when no one is really reading my blog...hahas.
My posts are just on ramdom notes and too mundane for any comments from u peeps...

I'm currently working at a student care centre, tiring yet meaningful...
I am busy the whole week:

Monday to Friday - Work at SCC.
Saturday - Singing practice at TAS Tanjong Pagar. 2pm-5pm
Singing practice at Soka Choir. 8pm-10.30pm (but I normally skip it!)
Sunday - Singing practice at Soka Choir 9.30am-4pm

The Soka Choir is currently preparing for a mini concert in end of June,
So the practising time is lengthened by another 2 hours...
It's better this way, I think....
But I'm afraid that by June, I have already moved to Spore...
By then, I cant be able to go for singing practices in JB....
That means, I cant participate in the concert...
Well, I nearly quarreled with my parents over this issue...
They thought it is just too meaningless to fuse over this...
I was angry.
But I really do enjoy singing...
And hanging out with friends at TAS is the best moments in my life!

Went to Swesens for the second time to eat dinner...
Cost me a bomb but I didn't feel hurt as I paid...
It was the funniest and the most enjoyable dinner I ever had...
White chocolate blondie, a new dessert recommended by my friends...
I'D JUST LOVIN' IT!
The pizza and pasta were as tasty too...
Didn't make a wasted trip to Swesens...
The best was me and Sam walked around Orchard and she showed me her art corner at *scape centre..
It was indeed an ideal spot to generate creativity and ideas...
I kinda admire peeps with deep passion and talent for art...
They can draw wadever they like and there is no definition to grade their works...
It is a different kind of freedom to express yr thoughts and feelings...
I hope i can have this kind of talent in me...
It should be a wonderful feeling and inspiration to draw well...
Chatted alot with Sam and found out that she is actually a girl with very strong passion and self-dependent character towards her life, family and love...
I admire her way of living and her principles in life...
Although I'm already 18, sometimes I just feel that I am still not up to the 'standard' and 'soul' that a 18-year-old should possess...
I am ashamed to be childish and shallow...
I admit, I am.
It takes me alot of courage to swallow insults from friends and even strangers...
I find it difficult to accept insults in the way that I think I wasn't at wrong...
Maybe I am still not as mature to face facts and dreadful peeps out there...
Even some friends are like that, I just dunno how to face it...
I hope life will be alot better for me when i start school...
I am still glad that i can find friends that share same interests and darn loads of topics to chat about!
I just love the feeling of it!
Think should be that's all...
It's going to be another week of tortures and stress ahead!
Jiayou and work hard! (for myself >.<)

Happy Birthday to me!

2008-02-23T21:42:00.003+07:00

This my birthday cake!
Strawberry mousse!
Quite a happy gathering, played fun games and ate delicious food...
I prepared spaghetti for them too!
And they praised it too!
This should be the most memorable birthday celebration ever...
But it's funny that I bought the cake for myself...
Haha...
Received more than 10 smses to wish me happy bdae!
Last year I had only 1 sms!
But I'm still glad peeps still rmb my bdae!
Thanks alot, peeps!
I really appreciated them!
Although my girls cant celebrate with me,
they made an effort to wish me happy bdae online at 12am today!
THANKS!
Think that's all, I have to sleep early today!
Thanks, once again to everyone!

Eve of the special day

2008-02-22T22:04:00.002+07:00

Well, maybe birthday isn't a special day at all...
It's just another day, like any other day...
I missed the birthday songs my classmates used to sing together...
Or sometimes I'll just lead the class to sing birthday song to the special person.
But I don't think I can do that anymore, since I left school...
Sometimes, I kinda miss school alot...
Missed the uniform, and the daily routine of listening to boring lessons....
I still remember last year, I bought chocolates and made straw hearts for my friends during my birthday...
Some peeps may think it's ridiculous that the bdae girl is giving presents and not receiving,
But to me, the feeling of giving is wonderful, it makes someone happy...
It makes me happy too!

Awaiting work and I have got it, i do hope so.
Maybe to work at a student care centre...
I hope i can do well for a month,
And off I go to start new school life at Poly...
Speaking of it, I had been posted to Spore Poly MassComm...
And I am not happy about it,
So I did an appeal to Chinese Studies NP.
Hana was lucky to get into NP MassComm...
I bet I wasn't as lucky...
Some of my friends had the same situation...
Cant get into their first few choices...
It's kinda sad lah...
But still all the best to them.
I seriously hope I can appeal successfully into CHS NP.
Then i can study together with Chuan Whai n Joyce!
Miss them loads!

I hope I can enjoy the special day tml...
Having a mini party gathering at my friend's house...
Celebrating my birthday at the same time...
It's kinda first time having a bdae party...
I never had one in my 17 years of life..
It's abit pathetic lah...
But i hope from next year onwards, my bdae will be more joyous and noisy!
Haha.
Happy 18th birthday to myself!

Valentine's Day

2008-02-14T22:28:00.003+07:00

Happy Valentine's Day!
Well,to me, it is just another day without presents and showered love...
Been stuck to the sofa and tv for 6 hrs plus...
Watching the final episode of Coffee Prince...
Simply loved the show...
A show of dream pursuits and relationships...
I realised that the love shown in the show is pure and sweet...
Without too much of mushy stuff and sweet talkings...
They showed straight-forwardness in expressing their love to the other half...
I just liked the way they displayed their affection...
This is a new kind of love I'm looking forward to...
I hope I can be as carefree when I'm in love...

I start to love Jazz songs...
I just feel relaxed and comfortable when I listen to these songs...
Corrinne Bailey Rae, Sarah Brightman and The Corrs (they are pop singers, I suppose?)
No work, bored.
Trying to make myself feel occupied...
Wanna learn something new and exciting...
Wanna go somewhere fun and relaxing...
Wanna love someone and give the best to him...
I just wanna live happily and meaningfully...

Carefree

2008-02-13T20:48:00.002+07:00

Bored.
Suddenly, I felt sick of my blogskin.
But I am just so lazy to change a new one...
Been watching TV for the past 8 hours yesterday and the day before....
Coffee Prince, borrowed from Cerlyn.
And someone just gave one to me for my birthday present.
I was like damn shocked lor, suddenly just appeared in front of me...
I bought old S.H.E albums today...
They were just karaoke vcds....
I wanted the cds...
But it's better than nothing...
Heard that my parents are selling house and car and intend to buy a flat in Spore...
I cried, seriously and badly...
Cos i cant bear to leave this house which I've been staying for more than 14 years...
I missed the scenery and the warmth of the sunshine
that would shine thru my window every morning...
I missed the times when I was small and used to run around the house...
U may wanna say that I had alrealy moved out of this house the year before for 6 mths...
But it is different.
At Sem's house, I know I'll still go back to my house...
I'm not afraid of losing the familiar smell and feel of the house...
But this is a totally different case...
I may not be able to come back anymore...
I cant run around and jumping mad around the house...
I just have to stay put in that damn small flat,
which i can just walk thru it in less than 50 steps...
I will grow sick of the flat very soon...
I will lose the sense of belonging...
I am afraid I cant stay on...
I miss everything here...
I dun wanna leave....

Chinese New Year!

2008-02-10T22:06:00.000+07:00

Sorry, I hasn't got much time to update...
Chinese New Year!!!!
Actually, in the past, I don't really like CNY...
Cos my hong-bao money is always so little....
I dun wanna say how little...
But CNY is just too bored for me...but not this year!
Apart from hong-baos, I gambled!
Mahjong, Blackjack!
Waner was damn lucky and she kept winning money!
Then some of us started to bid bet with her and we won a little!
Had alot of fun...
Yesterday, went Angel's house, also played mahjong...
But I tink my luck wasn't as good and kept losing...
Or is it that my mahjong skill not good enought?! XD
Heard that Hazel was sick and stayed at home alone...
So we went to visit her...
Played mini mahjong and got sick of it...
Sang K till quite late and hazel's parents came back...
Another hong-bao!
The following days of this week, I'm going to stay at home and rot...
No job and no dates...
I WANT TO WATCH MOVIES!!!!!
But it seemed that everyone is busy with school and work....
Well, maybe worse come to worst, I'll watch alone...
Oh yah, I saw loads of old S.H.E albums on sale at CD-Rama!
There were about 8 pieces which I really wanted to buy but each cost about $9.90...
I'm gonna go broke if I buy all...
Sad....
My birthday is 2 more weeks away!
But cant celebrate...but I dun wanna elaborate any of the details...
I just hope I can lead life happily...
Tink tat's all, plus I'm tired of gambling....

Busy!

2008-02-05T22:16:00.000+07:00

Sorry, didn't get to update my life!
So I'll try to update as much as possible!
Alvin called yesterday, needed me at work urgently!
So right after I woke up at 12pm,
I brushed my teeth and rushed off to work...
And the venue is VIVO CITY!
No choice, had to take cab, Alvin paying mah!
Reached there before the situated time, 1.30pm...
And I realised after so many times been to Vivo City,
I didn't know that there is GIANT in Vivo...
Sian diao...
By the way, I forget to mention that I'm selling Brands..
Which I've totally no idea how to sell...
Bird's Nest and Chicken Essence...
And the worse thing was that the shelf opposite to my product was New Moon,
Another brabd that was selling the same products...
But luckily their prices were more expensive and less popular...
So I managed to sell a few boxes...
As for today, the sales was alot better, a total of 12 boxes!
The so-called trainer came and showed me the lucky draw thingy which I didn't get to know yesterday...
With the lucky draw thing, the sales were alot better...
A uncle bought 3 boxes of chicken essence and 1 box of bird's nest loh!
Rich sia...
Then a lot of customers came and asked me about other products such as hair wax, after-shaves and many more...
I even had to recommend to a guy which kind of hair wax is more suitable for him... XD
But it was quite fun after all...
Tml I'm going back school, I suppose...
And I'm going to dye my hair!
haha...but not blonde lah!
So I wish everyone a HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR in advance!
Hope you'll get lots of hong-baos and money!!!

Shopping Again!!!

2008-02-03T00:41:00.000+07:00

Shopping again!!!
Went to Bugis and I hate crowds...
But no choice lah, had to squeeze with people...
Spent about 50 plus on 3 tops and a belt...
Happy! XD
I didn't have this feeling of contentment when I shop before..
I was quite glad to buy tops that I really need...
I'll buy 2 more long-sleeves tops!
Saw a mini denim skirt at CS in the morning and Mum asked me to buy.
Too small for me!
Had to give it to my sister...
But I didn't managed to buy the white skirt at Bugis cos I was considering...
Suddenly, I have the urge to WORK...and EARN $$$!!!
No money = No clothes!
Haha...
Rotting at home isn't a nice thing...
Pray hard I can get a JOB!!!

2008-02-03T00:06:00.000+07:00

Web: http://world.doubutsu-uranai.com

You are Black Panther, who can show rich affection and possess warm motherly tenderness.
You are not cautious person, and are passionate enough to express yourself openly to lead life.
You tend to be hard on yourself, but are kind and devoted to other people.
You prefer to have a career, and play an active part in the society.
You possess strong self-confidence and beliefs.
You put your passing ideas immediately into action.
Therefore you give an impression of daring and person with strong driving force.
You don't bargain so much, and the way in which you act according to your instinct and passion gives feminine attraction.
You use your endless dreams as driving force.
Once you decide on something, you are extremely determined to complete it, and don't care about the public opinions.
It may be good for you to have some kind of modesty and self-examination.
You have great artistic and beauty sense.
You may be suited to have a career as a fashion designer or interior coordinator.
You tend to please everyone besides your family.
Towards your own family, you are hard and nagging.
When you get married you will turn out as a wife who takes control of the household.

Shopping

2008-02-01T22:36:00.000+07:00

Finally, I can be out of the house and breathing 'fresh' air...
Haha, went out to shop with Mum...
Bought 2 pairs of shoes at Woodlands Centre Point.
One was sandals and another was boots.
Both cost 16.90 only, cant u believe it?
I love both pairs of shoes i bought.
And went to Far East to buy a pink tshirt...
And a bucket bag...
Actually I ordered two from a bag spree online..
But the designs at Far East were attractive and Mum bought 2...
The prices were about the same and I nearly regretted for ordering online...
But Mum said it was alright,
So now my house is going to have 4 identical bucket bags with different designs..
This is the first time I've spend this lavishly!
Tomorrow, I'm going to Bugis with my Msia fren to shop again!
Yeah, I'm skipping practice for once!
I'm tired of walking,
My legs are painful!
Muscles aching...
Better rest well and I can shop lively tml!
That's all!

Alone

2008-01-30T21:17:00.000+07:00

Rotting at home for about a week le...
All i did was wake up, eat , watch tv and play com...
I hate this kind of life...
But I've got no work...
Nobody has called me to work...
I am sad..
Sian ah...
I'm going to finish the korean drama " Joo Mong "...
Finally...
But after that, I'll be rotting at home again...
It seems like I've lose the goal of life...
But singing will still be the goal in my life at this moment..
I'll find a new goal in my life soon, i hope...
Till then, I should do my best and sing my best...
I may just lose the chance of singing when I go poly...
Treasuring every practice is what i could do...
So that's all I tink...

Goodbyes

2008-01-29T22:05:00.002+07:00

Is it hard to say goodbyes?
I've read many ppl's blogs...
They were recalling the past memories and happy moments in the secondary school life...
Who doesn't appreciate and cherish these precious memories?
But we'll still have to move on...
I'm glad that my friends had made true best friends in their 4 years of sec sch life...
I've made frens too...
But deep inside my heart, there is still a part of it that is feeling 'empty'...
I dunno why...
I am glad to know my friends in Riverside,
My 1/6 and 2/6 malaylanders and toilet gangs....
Yoges, Liping, Mahdi, Waner, Andy, Fitri...and many more...
I've had fun with them, no matter is it Sports Carnival or National Day Celebration...
I'll never forget how we danced Bangla and sang 'Where I belong'...
And we won the 1st place!
With Ms Nora around, our class seemed to be the best in every competitions...
With Ms Nora around, our 2/6 spirit never fade off or die down...
I appreciated what Ms Nora had taught me...
I've learn alot from her and from my 2/6 mates...
I'm glad and proud to be a part of 2/6 '05...
When it comes to 3/5, I admitted that I couldn't feel the spirit and the unity as a class...
I was quite sad with the performance of the class, not academically but physically and mentally...
We weren't as strong and determined as other classes...
People started to slack and 'heck-care' when it comes to Sports Carnival and Cross Country...
Even the classroom decoration was left aside and undone...
Unlike 2/6, everyone devoted themselves into the decoration
and would spend as much time as possible to finish up
and present our best to the judges...
I was forsaken by people around me...
I felt depressed as a member of 3/5 initially...
But slowly, I realised my classmates had potentials and hidden talents...
I started to appreciate them and learnt from them...
I would ask for help and enquire them about stuff that i was unsure of...
I made great frens in 3/5 cum 4/5...
Sem, Vivien, Jieling, Hana, Zhanpeng, Kenneth, Divya, Aqilah...
I learnt that they are multi-talented and cheeky some of the times...
I had fun times with them and they made my life in 4/5 as meaningful as possible...
I once thought I'll never like this school cos of my stubbornness to choose a school out of anger and disappointment...
But I'm glad everything turned out well and fine...
Great friends and precious memories...
Maybe it isn't so hard to say goodbyes afterall...
Fate will bring us together and break us apart when time comes...
We'll just have to move on with our life and put these memories aside,
in a cherished part of our hearts and let it be kept untouched and safe.
Life has to go on...
We cant let friends distract our future and choices we made that determine our future...
Friends come and go but still, they'll leave footprints in our hearts that would be cherished and remembered for long...
I do hope everyone can strive their best and work towards each of your goals and dreams...
ALL THE BEST AND GOOD LUCK!!!

Personality tests

2008-01-27T20:25:00.000+07:00

I was deciding whether to register for JAE,

and i am quite confused.

So i had a fun time going through all these quizzes and tests!

Hope you'll like it!

This is quite a cool website! Try it!

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/

Personality test

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet.

You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict.

Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic.

When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person.

And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex.

In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life.

You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income.

Knowing what you like to do is important.

Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control.

Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice.

People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues.

Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

The Real You

Here is the analysis:
1.You've got great self-confidence and you're full of charm.

Most guys who get to know you will be attracted to you.

You are far from sweet and proper; your intriguing personality fascinates them.

Most guys find it easy to fall for a girl like you.

2.You really care about other people's feelings and are quite serious about the issues that affect your life.

You are sincere, and your concern for the well-being of others makes many people want to be your friend.

3.You strictly follow rules, and you expect other people to be the same as well.

People can get tired of you easily, as you can make them feel a little guilty about themselves.

You always make decisions on your own, and can be dismissive of other people's advice.

You like to be the leader in groups, but can forget to be concerned about the people you are with.

4.Guys see you as being a thinker and a careful person.

They will be really attracted to this quality in you, but you need to learn to speak your mind, otherwise people will find you too shy and quiet.

Learn to relax and lighten up--it's okay to have fun sometimes.

When you learn to develop your fun-loving side, guys are going to flock to your side.

5.Your boyfriend believes that you are a strong and independent person. Your confidence and cheerfulness make you an attractive person to be around, but sometimes you need to pay more attention to what other people, including your boyfriend, are thinking.

Your personality love style

Here is the analysis:
You desire a love that will last forever.

You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that's why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them.

You don't just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person's personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment.

If a guy doesn't meet your expectations, you would rather be alone.

Your love has to be perfect.

Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.

What type of personality do you have?

Here is the analysis:
Kind and Gentle

Your kindness is your charm - you are also gentle and sweet.

Everybody likes to be around people with your personality.

Like a psychologist, people like to talk to you to discuss their problems because you are proper and discrete, as well as confident.

You look mature and people respect you.

People with this kind of character are few and far between.

What does being a friend really mean to you?

You value your friendships: 60%
You love your friends very much - so much so that it's actually quite a worry.

You may not be able to cope very well when you do lose somebody's friendship.

You are a very sensitive and fragile person, and are therefore likely to get upset easily.

You care for your friends and are willing to do anything that they ask you to do.

Sometimes this can make your friends think that you are a bit of a nuisance.

Nevertheless, people do really love you because your highest priority is your friends.

Jealousy Test
Jealousy Level: 50%
You harbor hidden feelings of jealousy

You easily get jealous of other people, but you manage to control your expressions and emotions.

For instance, when a close friend tells you that she has met the man of her dreams, you might sincerely say to her "Congratulations!", but what you're really thinking is "You're so lucky! Why can't I be you?"

Your Hidden Talent
Here is the analysis:
The Mass Communicator

You have a cheerful personality and you are a naturally kind person.

Your hidden talent isn't really that hidden at all: you shine among a crowd.

You would make an ideal news announcer, flight attendant or model - any position that would give you an opportunity to deal with plenty of people. A tip for you is to avoid getting too deeply involved in others' personal lives - otherwise you might find yourself constantly being asked for help.

Who is your dream guy?
Here is the analysis:

Unlike most others, he walk on his own path.

He's creative and willing to learn about anything.

Music and movies are his favorites.

He's kind to everyone.

You can feel his inner beauty through his words.

He's comfortable among a circle of friends.

He's looking for someone to share his hobbies.

Haix, i tink i should go to submit my registration le...

Bye, hope ppl can get into their dream schools and courses!

Good luck!

After the release

2008-01-24T23:28:00.000+07:00

Yup, I'm happy with my results.
I didn't expect too much for myself, cos i knew I didn't put in my very best.
15 is abit off my target, but I didn't cry.
Luckily the history 4 years ago didn't resurface...
I'm glad that my English and Combined Humanities got B3!
My Physics so tyco lor, never study also can achieved B3!
Sadly, for my Amath, I got C5...
Sorry, WJ Korkor!
My biology got A2 and Chemistry got B3 (most prob cos of my practical!)
My higher chinese got A1...
So overall, I only got 3 distinctions including my Chinese taken during sec3...
Heard from Jingjie that only 2 people got A1 for higher chinese,
and that's ME and Angel if i'm not wrong!
Haha, happy:)
Although my name didn't appear on the screen, at least I know I did well.
Loads of my frens were better, 14 and less...
Especially Ting Shien, Yeun See, Waner, Wan Leng!
They are all single-digit scorers!
As for Hong Wei, he got 13!
He got the same score as me during prelims...
Shows that he've put in more effort than I do...
I was quite shocked when I got to know that some of the combined science students
in my school did alot better than me!
Diann and Nandhini scored 13!
And Simin scored 11!
Wow...
After all the crying and laughter in school,
I went K with Sem, Zel and Xin...
Had a good time singing and releasing all my sorrow in the songs...
Now, I have to crack my mind with all the choices of school!
Hope I can get into my dream course!
Jiayou ppls!

Results release!

2008-01-24T08:52:00.000+07:00

Today is the release of 'O' levels results!

Many ppl, i believe, are suffering from pre-results release-stress....

Relax!

My sister used to have nightmares and sleepwalks during the period before her 'N' levels result release...

Hahaha...

I've learnt to be relaxed and look things at the brighter side...

I used to be very nervous before exams and it turned out that when you are nervous, you cant do your paper well...

So, for the whole of 'O' levels, I didn't panick as much as before during the end-of-year exams...

I hope this time I could do better than the prelims...

I didn't set a very high target cos i know my limits and performance...

I still can recall the day I took my PSLE results...

I put myself to high expectations and in the end, I got 5 marks less to my target...

I cried terribly and became depressed...

And due to my stubborness, I chose a school which i din't really like.

Somehow, I still hate myself for making stupid choices when i was in P6...

But now, no matter how badly i've done, I must choose a wise route for myself, with no regrets...

I believe everyone will be able to do well this time...JIA YOU!!!

For every person out there, ' No matter what happens, strive to your best and live with no regrets! '

I'll still face the consequences of my effort and strive harder in the future!

Good luck, everyone!

A Complicated love story

2008-01-20T11:49:00.000+07:00

This is a real story of her, him and him.
It was a love triangle, but u may want to consider it as a two-timer story.
He and she had been in love for more than 5 years,
since the choir started in the early millennium...
They went to practices and performance...
Everywhere they go, they'll stick together like they've never separated before.
After a long period of relationship, she started to feel that this love was just a dependent habit.
She will give cold replies and showed least interest in talking with him.
2 years ago, he appeared.
He was more handsome than him and younger than him.
Although he was young at the age of 23, his thinking and mindset was beyond his age.
He wasn't aware of her change of attitude towards himself.
She started to make friends with him and slowly, they started a underground relationship.
Only her sister and me knew about it, but we never told anyone, even each other.
Keeping this secret was a hard task, but i managed it.
Whenever I go practices, I'll look at him and my heart really bleed for him.
He never know what they were up to, he treated her as normal, the caring and concerned way.
and she treated him the cold way as before.
I was with quite good terms with him, and he told me about it,
when i was suspecting it.
My heart broke, I asked him,
"Do you know that she has got a boyfriend already, for 5 years?"
He replied,
"I know, but I'll still continue to love her, or else I'll regret."
"Even if it takes me to be her 'concubine', I'm really willing to do that."
I cried, not because of anybody,
Because I didn't know love can be that generous.
She was very selfish, she didn't request a break-up or make clear with him.
He continued to be fooled by her.
He purchased a house and waiting for her heart to settle.
He proposed to her but she rejected.
She gave an excuse, saying that he was pressuring her.
This was her reason for rejecting the propose.
Isn't it ridiculous?
Finally, she wanted a break-up with him.
He found it a sudden and he couldn't take the blow.
He cried, when her reason was that he was interfering too much in her life.
He was caring enough to fetch her wherever she wanted to go,
take care of her when she was seriously ill.
And this is what he had gotten for return of a nearly-decade-relationship.
Life has to move on.
Now, the 3 of them still sit in the same room, singing the same song and the same harmony.
I don't know how they managed to face each other despite the betrayal of love.
But I do hope he can forget her and meet his perfect match in the near future.
I solemnly pray for him and may he stay happy forever.
To the both of them, I don't know what to say, I just hope betrayal for once is more than enough.
Love is selfish but it contains no betrayal and cheating of feelings.
Treasure your love and remember that
love is the most divine feeling and emotion, a human can feel and appreciate.

Getting busy

2008-01-18T12:31:00.000+07:00

Went to Ngee Ann's Open House yeaterday.

It wasn't as good as I expected.

I was quite disappointed in fact.

The event was disorganised and there wasn't any crowd control.

In the end, me n my frens left without even taking a look at the business corner which was fully packed with students.

The guide just briefed us on the courses for business and left.

Although there were performances and activities, i felt that the open house wasn't exciting at all.

I'm sorry if i've angered anybody in the sense that I can also see their efforts out into the event.

It was still well-done as some of the schools answered my doubts and cleared my mind.

It was a humid day though, we were sweating in air-conditioned room!

I just hope everything can turn out alright for them.

I am going to be darn busy from this week onwards.

Not because of work, but singing.

I have been going back to TAS Youth Voices last week,

and returned to my Soka Choir yeaterday for small group practice.

There are practices for both sides on Saturday and i've to rush here n there.

TAS- 12-5pm ; Soka Choir- 8-10.30pm

See?

Haha, but i still hope i can find something meaningful to do before i start school.

I may not earn as much money from work and buy laptop with my money,

but the fulfillment and contentment of singing really makes me feel happy and blissed.

I sworn to myself that i must earn lotsa money from end of Os till school starts.

But due to the situation when i only work once a week, i tink i can just sit at home and rot!

Money is not everything, but without money, there'll not be everything.

I truly believe this statement, but i cant do anything to make money appear or fall from sky.

I am just tired of waiting for work schedule and rot at home.

I may not be able to update as much so i apologise here to my faithful readers lah,

although i dunno who u are cos u ppl always nv tag!

I look forward to a new life in singing and make many more new friends in the coming days!

Lost in the world of reality

2008-01-15T13:37:00.000+07:00

I am afraid of growing up, the stress and expectations of people around me...
Suddenly, I felt that there is an invisible wave of fear rushing towards me...
I have to learn how to observe people before i do or speak anything...
The impression of myself brought to people is also as crucial.
People may dislike me or look down on me due to some stupid actions i did,
I am afraid of how others look at me.
I am scared that I'm not up to standard or I am not mature enough in terms of words and actions.
I don't know how can escape from this fear of mine.
There are still alot of things that I don't know how to do or say...
I dream to be a perfect person, without any flaws or mistakes..
But that's impossible in life, i know.
Imperfection is me and i will accept it.

Open House

2008-01-13T13:16:00.000+07:00

Went to Temasek Poly's Open House yesterday with xin n sem.
There was a very cute guy, James who was our i-guide!
He was very nice and xi xin (he brought tissue pprs!)
He helped Sem to carry her goodie bag and helpful.
Plus, he's a Scorpio!
Wow, my perfect match!Bleahx!
But he's abit quiet lar, but overall,he's really a nice guy lor!
TP's facilities and environment had stunned me,
I'm so fascinated and dreading to go TP...
But i am not sure whether going Culinary & Catering Management is the right choice...
I'm so afraid that I might regret...
But seriously, the cafe n restaurant that was newly built was damn nice n posed!
The cafe's name is Sugarloaf, which i find it very sweet and easy to rmb.
The ToP Table was another venue that really stunned me!
The wine tasting room was absolutely fantastic!
The atmosphere and the furniture were double "wow"!
The students there were very friendly and well in giving us details of the different courses.
I didn't managed to go SP ans NYP.
Next week i'm going to Ngee Ann Poly...
Hope they won't dissapoint me!

I am working!
Haha, the first day of work was terrible, i only managed to sell abt 10 boxes of contact lenses.
The next day, i sold 43 boxes!
I am so afraid of tml!I hope i could do well!
I wanna earn money n more money!
Sometimes, I'm confused.
Is money a good thing or a bad one?
It can motivate ppl and yet ruin ppl's future...
I just hope i will feel contented enough as i grow older...
I dun wan to see myself sinking into the world of fame and money and branded stuff.
It's just too scray and difficult to pull yrself out of the money trap.
Be contented and it's enough.
Well, i'm at a loss of words.
That's all!

Awaiting job

2008-01-09T12:02:00.000+07:00

Yeah! I'm working tml!
Sorry for not updating my blog since new year...
Didn't had the mood to blog anyway...
My life's been very boring...
But i'm glad i've watched 'Alvin & the chipmunks' !
Almost regretted if i didn't watch.
It's cute, funny and meaningful...
I WANT TO EARN MONEY!!!!
Staying at home really sucks...
I'll wake up at around noon time almost everyday...
And i would start watching 'Zhu Meng' dvd from 2pm to abt 4plus...
That's my life at home!
I really wanna go out!
Seriously, i've fallen sick last week of rotting at home...
Cough, flu and nearly fever!
And another thing to mention.
I'm going back to TAS.
Yah, u didn't read it wrongly...
Due to someone's urgent need for me,
I've to go back and sing...
I'm going to Soka choir too...
So i'll soon be very very busy with work and singing....
Doubt that i could still sleep until noon time!
Results are going to be released in about 2 week's time!
I'm so damn afraid and confused of where to go....
Open houses are coming up but due to work,
I tink i'll be missing some of the open houses...
Well, i hope life will be more meaningful and uptight with activities,
so i wont be able to tink of my own worries and
be over-concerned about some stuff....
I'll try hard to update as much as possible.
when my life gets abit more exciting and not boring!
haha...that's all!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2007-12-31T21:50:00.000+07:00

WISHING EVERYONE A
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Welcome The Year Of
2008 !

Wishing for World Peace and Freedom!
Hope that everyone can live happily and blissfully!
Forever loved and taken care of!
Happy New Year!
All The Best!

p.s : i love counting-down at home!
cos i can drink champagne!

Meaningless life

2007-12-30T22:50:00.000+07:00

I cant understand my emotions.
I cant feel any happiness in whatever i do now.
I only felt anger and disappointment in myself.
I dunno what i live for, how to pursuit my dreams, and how to survive alone...
I felt helpless and weak...
I lost the power of smile and the power of love.
I feel that i am nothing...
I lost myself, lost my senses, lost the ability to think properly...
I wanna sing, sing my heart out...
I feel like only voices could help me up....
I feel relaxed whenever i listen to music...
I can forget my troubles and emotions...
I just hope next year could be a better one....
It's just a small wish of mine...
Just like that...

Reflections of 2007

2007-12-27T20:01:00.000+07:00

This post is specially written to recap the happenings of this whole year.

- Choir got silver for SYF, and i cried cos tot we could do alot better.

- Nearly went for Campus Superstar de audition but due to some people, i cant make it and i gave up the chance of going.

- The person did things that I always wanted him to do, and i rejected him.
I felt bad for wasting his time too. (sorry)

- In the first time in my 17 years of life, I moved out of my cosy home and stayed with ah Sem for nearly half a year!

- The next major issue is, of course, O levels.
But it seemed that i took it not as serious as i should be.

I have STM ever since i dread studying, i cant seemed to remember the things i ought to remember, hence i have difficulty recalling about some other happenings...
But overall, I think my performance this year is not as outstanding as the past..
Due to my indecisiveness and ignorance towards the feelings of people,
I've hurt friends and family in one way or another.
I always hate myself for being so ignorant and emotional when i shouldn't be doing that.
I wanted to change but i guessed i hadn't try a single bit.
I missed the old self when i could do anything i wanted and
things always went smoothly as i wanted them to be.
I can laugh as heartily and i dun have many troubles with friends....
I used to love the clique in primary school with Kim, Swu San and Liu Zhe...
I've no clique or best friends in Secondary and i trust myself more than other people,
cos they betrayed my trust....
I used to talk and chatter alot with even not-as-close friends...
I've become quiet and mute,
my teacher even commented that i'm a quiet student in class in the report book...
when last time my primary school teacher said i was the most talkative and sociable in class...
Is it because I had changed unknowingly?
Or is it that the environment and the people I faced are not as friendly,
and i ought to protect myself against insults and mean looks...
I cant open up my heart to friends and tell them my stuff anymore...
Even my best fren that i considered to be one, betrayed me...
This showed that people cant be trusted anymore....
I'm alone, i admit.
Friendship and love relationship to me are a fake...
People used you and run away without you when you are not needed...
I rely no one, i only need myself....
Until the day i can really open up my heart to the right person,
i shall remain quiet and unnoticeable to people...
I realised the more i grown up,
maturity forced me to accept things that i dun wished to accept...
I wished i could always stayed as a kid and never grow up,
living safely in the arms of family...
But reality is reality,
dream cant overpower reality...
I prayed that 2008 will be a smoother and successful year for me...
This is the least i could ask for...

My Christmas Present!

2007-12-27T01:38:00.000+07:00

This is my christmas present, the only one!
And the result of rotting at home for 2 days!

I made this myself leh!
I'm proud of myself and I think this should be the best Christmas present I've received ever!
Although it was from me myself,
the feeling of contentment is very wonderful!
It's like you have put in all your effort
to make something the best that it could ever be...

This is the inner part of the little purse i've made...
The important thing is that I've made it!
No matter how ugly the inside may be,
the outside is nice de!
Notice the 2 trails of thread?
I wanted to make its shape as perfect as possible so
I adjusted the shape by sewing it again!
I've made quite a number of mistakes,
like counting wrong grids and
overlapping the wrong gaps...
But i've tried very hard to mend and modify my mistakes...
so it seemed perfect to your eyes...
but not mine!
Haha..
Luckily i didn't prick myself too hard,
or else i'll bleed!
It's been a long time since i've done cross-stitching...
It's a good thing to be engaged in something when you are rotting at home...
So maybe tml i'll start on the friendship bands!
Give me some moral support!

Looking at this cute and hilarious picture,
I just realised that I am still awake!
I've going to bed late at around 3am almost every night,
for 2 consecutive days!
You'll sure bet that my dark circles are as large as the pandas!
Haha...
Yeah, my dark circles are getting worse...
I haven tried out the aid to dark circles...
( Using sliced apples as eye masks! )
Maybe you can try that too!
I hope the results are good...
But if i go on tormenting myself...
I guess my dark circles will never leave me!
I'm depriving of books to read again!
I dun have a library card and you can expect me
to buy books every week mah...
i'll go broke!
So if anybody who wish to lend me your library card for a long period of time,
please inform me by phone!
Haha.
thank you in advance!

Rotting at home

2007-12-26T21:32:00.000+07:00

I found my sunflower art piece!
Haha.
But i guessed i lost my whole folder of art pieces when i cleared my room.
My mum said maybe she had thrown away.
Ahh!!!
My baobei leh!
Haix.....
I've been rotting at home for 2 days!
Doing cross-stitch for the past 5 hours!
Going to be completed...
I'm drinking coffee now so later can finish the rest of the piece...
AHHH!
Tml i'm going to stay at home again!
So sian ah!
Dying liao........
Luckily i'm going out on Saturday to watch Vivien's ballet concert!
Haha.
Nvm, i still can tahan another 2 days...
So till then, I must perserve.

Merry Christmas ^^

2007-12-25T22:22:00.000+07:00

Merry X'mas
to everyone!

( although it's abit too late le! )

Maybe christmas to me is just another day....
I still remember last year,
I was standing on the mini stage at Downtown East,
Singing Christmas songs...
At that moment,
I believed that was the best moment ever...
Because i never celebrate Christmas ever since I was small...
I envied those ppl who can get presents and eat heartily during the festival...
It's just mere happiness...

Today, i woke at around noon time again,
actually i should be outside celebrating with my prisch frens de...
but due to many inconvenience, many of them cant make it...
so I decided to stay at home...
I did cross-stitching for the whole afternoon,
and was watching tv while i was doing it...
so i made alot of stupid mistakes...
had a very hard mending those wrong stitches....
and realised that one of the colour threads wasn't enough,
so i used the normal kind of thread which mummy used to sew clothes to replace the colour.
In the end, it turned out quite well, although the thread was abit thinner than the original one.
Sometimes, i felt happy after accomplishing a handicraft work...
i am halfway to success!
Yesterday, i bought threads at Orchard for making friendship bands...
And during the evening,
I realised the whole long piece of thread is intact as one,
where the shades of colour of the thread moves from pale to dark and to pale again!
I thought it was supposed to be separated into different shades...
Oh god...
Well, I'm back to handicrafts again!
I envied Wan Leng for being so creative and artistic
in designing and drawing personalised shoes.
I was once as artistic as her,
we shared this common interest of drawing during our primary school days...
I still remembered those memories...
I didn't pursuit my little talent...
Wan Leng did it well and successful.
Hooray for her!
Sometimes, i wonder what am i good at?
Singing?
Drawing?
Handicrafts?
Everything i am good at is just half way there...
Not as good but not as bad....
Maybe considered as average bah...
My ability is insufficient...
to compare with the rest....
I've to work harder...
Ate a delicious dinner at night with family...
Finally, something to be proud of mentioning today...

Changed my blogskin again in less than 3 days...
Spotted this blogskin just now...
I used to love sunflowers a lot!
I drew a piece of drawing of a sunflower
and it was the best piece of art i've done!
and i'm still proud of it....
and...
i just realised i forget where i out that piece of art....
AHH!~
Nevermind...later i'll find it for sure.
I cant afford to lose that...
Bless me...

Lonely Christmas

2007-12-24T21:32:00.000+07:00

Sad.
Lonely christmas for me...
nothing to do on christmas eve.
my sis's happily celebrating with frens!
AHHH!
so unfair!
not to mention about work...
i'm been slacking at home for the past 2 days...
i wonder if i'll feel happier if i'm working today n tml...
DOUBLE PAY leh!!!
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
haix.
tink i gonna stay at home and slack tml!
haha..
SIAN!

Slacking at home!

2007-12-23T16:41:00.000+07:00

Well, i'm tired of working.
So luckily, there wasn't any work for me yesterday and today.
Went to Melaka yesterday with my family.
Visited my aunt first before going to Melaka.
So long didn't visit her liao, she looked so much older than her age.
Pitied her life of working and raising children.
Went to Melaka around evening and shopped around.
Ate beef noodles and satay celup!
so delicious!
Bet u'll never find anything more delicious than the both dishes in Melaka!
Haha...today?
Had an urge to wash all my old bags,
so i took out 7 bags to wash...
scary bah?
well, it's a tough work washing 7 bags but i did it!
jus realised i used to waste money when i was little.
bleahx!
later i'm going to watch hong xing da jiang le!
yeah!
finally!
haha, but i still wanna earn money leh!
give me work!

Spending money..

2007-12-20T00:44:00.000+07:00

Ya i got my second pay, $208.
2 weeks of standing motionlessly, and this is the reward.
Nice hur, isn't it?
Went out with Wanleng, Liu Zhe, Joanne and Xin Yi and of course Ting Shien..
A p6 class gathering, ended up only 6 ppl gathered.
Quite a fun day out.
Tried to play pool for the very first time!
Didn't know that Wanleng could play so well!
Joanne too!
Ting Shien is a beginner and for goodness' sake, he played quite well too!
Stunned us lah, haha.
Boys usually learn this kind of things faster than girls.
I still cant hold the stick properly lor, aiming also very lan.
Hope to play more of that soon!
After that, 3 ppl gone.
Left me, wanleng and tingshien.
So we decided to drop the plan of watching movie,
and we went to Woodlands Sakae sushi to eat.
Actually it didn't taste as nice, and cost me a bomb!
but i loved mochi!
i think i going to start mochi-cravings le!
found a super oiishi mochi shop at bugis.
1 small little 33g of mochi cost $2.
but i tink it's worth lah..haha.
should have known abt mochi earlier..
i'm such a noob at food...lol
today went to bugis with ah Sem to hunt for Vivien's bdae gift.
Such a hassle to pick gifts...haix...
walked around bugis street for quite a long time and still we cant decide what to buy.
haiyo, i might as well just bake a cake!
haha, more sincere in that way.
Had been spending money on food and transport..
Mum didn't gove me any allowance...
sian...but anyway, spending yr own money hurts lor!
but u can really control the urge to use yr own hard earned money!
that's a good thing!
Christmas is just next week and i have no idea how to spend the day.
haix...

WORK WORK & WORK!!!

2007-12-15T23:05:00.000+07:00

I'm so surprised that Xin came to look for me after my work!
Haha, but i'm still glad that she rmbs me...=P
We went for dineer and chatted alot lah...
Tok abt work lor...haha
I'm so tired of working...
maybe next week i gonna go shopping!
Haha...so sian, work 2 more weeks and that's it!
I going to hotel work i supposed.
I can work more dyas at hotel rather than standing at shopping centres for2 days a week only.
But that's tiring too...
I love serving people lah...
So i hope hotel is alright for me!
I'm looking forward to my p6 gathering next tuesday!!!
Yeah! Haha.
Christmas is coming, and i tink i'm celebrating with Sem...
Should be lah...
I'm one lonely girl who have no guy n many frens to celebrate christmas with.
Haha.
But i'm contented to have a few good true frens.
That's enough already.
I wanna buy loads of albums and drama sets!!!!
I'm so damn bored staying at home!
I cant even go overseas for holiday....
Sad...
Ppl went to Japan, Genting and Hong Kong.
Me?
In msia and spore.
Ppl said i'm travelling overseas almost everyday.
LOL
What an insult!
Nevermind, i am going to earn loads of money and travel round the world when i grow up!
Haha...
That's all!
Bye=P

S.H.E Rocks!

2007-12-11T20:59:00.000+07:00

I've spending the whole afternoon watching all my S.H.E vcds and dvds.
Although i cant finish all lah,
i managed to watch all the perfect scenes...
i felt so contented slacking for today!
Haha, u must think i'm mad!
Well, i am thinking to buy all the past albums of S.H.E!
I'm working and getting pay...
But the difficult thing is where to find those past albums...
They may cost a bomb!
Ha, i must jiayou lor!
Jiayou in my work, earning money,
and searching for the old albums!
I'm intending to buy Dou Niu Yao Bu Yao de whole series and soundtrack...
No choice, who ask me to be so in love with Hebe!
She even sang my favourite song!
Xie yi shou ge, write a song (translated in english)
It's in my playlist!
I've been thinking about the past,
when i used to sit in the library with LiuZhe, my old pri schmate...
We used to sing along S.H.E's songs...
our library had stereo sets so she would bring her S.H.E album and we'll sit down and sing along with them...
I dun have much money in the past so i can really afford to buy their albums...
Now i share this love with Hongwei and Yeun See...
Both are S.H.E fans too!
I really missed the past....
But i cant do anything...
Just walk on to the future...

Boredom

2007-12-10T10:49:00.000+07:00

I have never felt this kind of boredom before in my whole 17 years of life.
It's just insane.
It feels like there's no where u could go or strive for at this point of time.
JC or Poly?
How i know?
Ppl already had their minds set n i'm still wondering where should i go...
This period of time is even more scary than O levels.
I feel empty inside me, like there's nothing to fill it full.
I guess, i really have to take my interests seriously, as in take it as a job or wadeva.
I realised that last year's holidays were alot better apart from the busy christmas carolling...
I got to do wad i like and wad i really loved...
And now?
Standing at shopping centres, serving the customers with enquiries and doubts...
I find it interesting too but not as contented...
I missed singing alot but wad else can i do?
maybe i can go down n see their performances and recall the times i myself singing on stage...
i am lonely, not because i have no one beside me,
but i gave up on my only interest in life....
i lose the chance of standing on stage and sing to the ppl ever again...
i even lose the time to go back to Soka choir to practice and perform with them...
probably for the rest of my life...
i missed the choir ppl and my 2 music teachers....
i missed all the great moments i had in secondary school and the frens i've made there...
moving on to a new chapter in life isn't as easy as i thought...
making new frens and gaining new experiences in another area is a challenge for me.
facing the real world and looking at ppl in a different perspective is what i gained at work...
i must really quit my impatient character and learn to be firm and strong inside me.
there are lots of things i've to learn n bear in the real world...
this is the time i should stand firm and accept the truth.
i have to make decisions that will affect my life and my family...
i will have to be responsible for my own actions and words...
no one else will protect me against the odds and nasty comments that i might get from ppl...
not even my own family...
i'll have to face those myself, alone...
look ahead and never turn back...

What are friends for?

2007-12-06T21:29:00.001+07:00

I am sad.
Not because i keep slacking at home,
it's because i realised i never understand how my friends feel.
Whoever passerby is, thank you.
I never try to understand how my friends felt of how i treat them,
never stand in their perspective to look at things,
this lies to my previous relationship too.
I failed to stand at his perspective to see things and understand his feelings.
I'm such a failure when it comes to observation of ppl.
Maybe i should try to learn the skills of observing ppl.
haha.
But sad to say, the art of understanding ppl is difficult.
Maybe i should go to the psychology course at Ngee Ann poly or Temasek poly.
wadeva.

Slacking isn't as great as i've thought.

2007-12-05T21:55:00.000+07:00

I've been slacking at home at home for the past few days.
But the feeling isn't that great as i've always thought it is.
I really missed the days at school and choir practices.
I missed the times i went practices for SYF and any other performances.
I still remembered there was once when i was in rehearsal of a certain event,
I sang halfway and i suddenly cant controlled and cried.
I told the teacher cos i hate seeing my seniors graduate,
when the true reason was i was sad when
he cant make it to the performance due to work purposes.
But i still can feel the sadness and craving to see him de feeling at that time.
I missed having lessons and talking craps with my beloved classmates,
missed the times when Ms Tan scolded me for dozing off in class,
and the other teachers gave me a nickname, 'Sleeping Beauty'.
Haha.
Sometimes i feel that school life creates excitement and liveliness in me.
I always loved school until sec3, where schoolwork gets out of my control.
But it's no use regretting now, school life is over and now i'll have to face the real world,
where rivals and competitions are what you would face.
No rest, no true frens, no friendly faces....
I really hate to leave school, to leave the age of childishness, to leave the arms of protection...
But there's nothing i could do to retrieve them back in time again...

Meeting new friends

2007-12-03T19:21:00.000+07:00

My weekends are exciting and fun!
U might be thinking that i'm crazy,
How can working be fun?
Well, making new friends is really exciting de.
Cool hulks everywhere!
Haha, ok i'm being a carzy-over-guys freako!
maybe i'm in my comfort zone for too long liao,
but i'm still glad to see the world.
Met many great guys during work.
Firstly, Henry who works at Causeway Point de Guardian.
He stays damn near to my house and he even wan me to acc him buy his gf's bdae present!
Funny guy lah, but he's quite a nice person.
One good point abt him is that he always walk beside me where the direction of the cars come,
he siad the cars will knock him first,
and he can push me away.
Some sort of heroic theory of his.
Haha, but that's very thoughtful of him.
Next, Eugene who works for Colgate.
His bdae is the same as u-know-who and he's another stupid lamer.
I asked him a very dumb question and he was totally stunned by it.
What a laugh!
But he's a nice person lah.
Next, Raymond who also works at Guardian.
A quiet Leo who has a cute cute boy look.
He offered me a Ferrero Rocher that Saturday!
Haha, thanks anyway.
Lastly, Weiliang who works for Eye Relax.
He's a damn hardworking guy and humorous.
He lokks quite old, abt 20 plus.
Turned out to be only 18, 3 mths older than me.
Why are guys nowadays looked older than their real age?
haha, i cant never understand.
He's quite a sociable person,
met him for only less than half a day and we had so much things to chat abt.
Great friend =)
Met a 20 yrs old girl yesterday,
she looks younger than her real age.
But she smokes.
I hate it, honestly.
She talked n talked non-stop, and called herself a 'noise pollution'.
Indeed.
Well, it's glad to make more friends!
These are some photos at work, enjoy!

I had nth better to do so took some random shots. hahasXD

Bear with christmas hat! Soooo cute!

Hazel's in love with the bear! Haha ^^

There was a photo-taking session at Cwp with the Disney's characters.
Sleeping beauty, Cinderella and Snow White.

I love Sleeping Beauty, she looked so pretty in that dress!

This is Cinderella, she's got a nice gown too!

This is the host for the event, not very charming as a prince but acceptable lah.

Christmas tree! I always love to take photos of these!

This is Snow White, big one and tiny one!
Cute, isn't it?

Shopping!

2007-11-30T21:45:00.000+07:00

Went out shopping with Zel!
Went to Yishun North Point to buy contact lens with the given voucher of $40 off!
Haha, i bought 2 boxes!
Then we went to Bugis, walked so long.
I was wearing boots of 3.5 inches and my feet still hurt till now!
Wasai, but we still bought some stuff.
Like sunglasses and tops lah..
Zel wanted to buy bikinis but i no money lah.
The cheaper ones no nice nice designs, den the exp ones are damn nice de loh!
haha...but it feels great to shop, yet painful to use money!

We had nothing better to do, so on the way back,
we camwhored lah!
haha, zel said wanna shoot some 'artistic' photos.
Well, i dun really get waf she meant but we did lame poses and just shoot lor.
Btw, there was a girl coming up to us teling we've been picked to be models. LOL!
The model scouters, actually.
Find for the sake of finding and earn money.
I dun tink i'm even up to the standard of being a model.
Short and fat. Hahas.
Well, i tink that's all.
Nothing much to say le.

Chalet

2007-11-30T21:28:00.000+07:00

These are some photos when i went to chalet.
I'm lazy to update the stuff and activities happened.
U may wanna go to my other classmates' blogs to know the details.
Hope u enjoy looking at the pictures!

This is the sea at East Coast after a heavy shower in the morning.
Isn't it beautiful?

This is the sand pyramid that some of my frens built!
Nice bah?

Chin Fern's bdae was on the 2nd night of chalet, 27 nov.
Nice cake huh?
Tasted nice too!

Eww! Imagine dipping yr french fries inside this sauce!
My frens did it! HAHA!

Went to Sheng Siong to buy food.
And i saw this extra huge cans of mushrooms in front of the cashier!

I always attract mozzies!
This is the conclusion of seduction!

Artistic strawberry! Hahas

Lastly, Aqilah was trying very hard to learn skating.
In the end, she had so many free tutors and she still cant cope with the learning!
Haha, JIAYOU!

Emm, that's all for the chalet part.

PROM!

2007-11-23T15:01:00.000+07:00

Haha, sorry for not posting on Prom!
Now i uploaded some photos, Enjoy!

This is the nicest self photo! haha ^^

I improvised the hoop earrings! Am i creative?

Me and Serene.

Smelly and tiring feets!

Simin and me, miss her loads!

Cam-whoring in front of this big mirror!

Sexy Nandhini and me!

Sem with balloon!

Hazel with balloon!

Yixin's beautiful feet!

Me and Hana!

3 siao siao girls!

Me and skinny Meiling!

My prisch frens! Beatrice and Sin Zhi!

Me and cute cute Shirley!

Poi Xin and Diann! My beloved frens!

My good fren, Pau Xian!

Us again!

Kai Ting and me!

Yixin and Poi Xin!

Princess Angel and me!

Angel and Yixin!

Camwhored in the toilet.

Me and Vivien

4 pretty NP girls and me!

Zel and me

Zel and Sem

Me and Zel

Me with Liping and Charmaine! Pretty ladies!

Me and Sexy Waner!

Us again!

Me and Diann! She so tall! Ahh!

Jiahao, Kai Lin, Diann and Gary.

Beatrice, hidden Kai Lin, Shirley and me!

Bread pudding and cakes!

Chwan Rong, Hazel and Sem

Me and Zel

LOL!

Me and Tavin!

Me and Chwan Rong! So TALL!

Zel Chwan Rong and Sem

Me and Sem

Napkin ^^

Random shot

Me and hana

Public affection! WOW

Me and Vivien

Sem and Vivien

Sem and Vivien

Me and Vivien

Sem me and hana

Yixin, Sem, Angel, Me and Vivien

Ginelle's doll! I forgot to take photo with her! haha.

Before make up!

Haha, there are still many photos with Yixin,
she haven upload them!
So please wait awhile for more pictures!
Thank you!

Leaving

2007-11-23T13:48:00.000+07:00

This is going to be quite a sentimental post.
Because I'm leaving the house.
After staying here for abt 5 months,
I realise how good it is to go almost anywhere anytime i wanted.
I can go cycling, shopping, working...
When i return to Msia,
I'll have to ask my mum to fetch me up n down the custom.
The feeling of this kind of freedom is undescribable.
I always loved how the breeze blew on my face when i cycled,
loved the way the grass prickled me when i laid on the big patch of field,
loved the times when i can go out with Hongwei, Tingshien n Yeunsee,
loved the times when we go library to study and chatted,
loved the times i joked and laughed abt anything under the sun with Sem,
loved the times when we stayed up late at night to watch Taiwan shows and
'Zhumeng', of course.
Loved the moments when i cycled to n back from school,
loved the times when i tumbled down from the bike with Sem,
loved the times when we go to eat muttubak with Sem's cousins and
cycled back home in the middle of the night,
loved the moments when i quarrelled n fought with Andrew,
laughing at him cos he said he was adnormal being short,
loved every moment i get to spend playing with Baby n Nono, (they're Dogs, 4 yr info)
loved the times when Sem n me cooked pasta and some other dishes,
loved the times when i locked myself in the room and mugged for Physics,
ended up keep running out of the room to watch tv,
loved the every dinner we had together.
I just wanna say 'Thank You' to Sem and the rest of her family.
I couldn't express my gratitude in words or actions,
just in my heart.
I would never forget the memories i've had here.
I guessed that's all i wanna say.
Thank You.

Forgotten.

2007-11-17T10:17:00.000+07:00

I am always the one who is being forgotten,
no matter what.
Is it because my face is too hard to rmb?
Is it because i'm not worth at all to be remembered?
Why do ppl always left me out?
Someone wrote a post saying that having a gang of friends makes lovers redundant.
I dun have a lover, neither do i have a gang of friends that go thru sadness and happiness tgt.
I'm alone.
My sister has her bagus gang,
he has his good old frens plus newcomers.
I have NOTHING.
So i guess i'll remain like this until
god knows when.
I'm tired of pacifying ppl and making them happy in the expense of my own loneliness.
I've had enough.

男人都是同类吗?

2007-11-15T00:50:00.000+07:00

男人对女人总是不能多体谅吗?
为什么总要让女人哭泣?
我不明白男人的心理是怎么想的...
爱一个人, 难道就是要去伤害她吗?
可能自己不知道自己对女人的态度与行为是多么的不合理,
男人永远都不会承认自己的错误.
他们爱面子, 脸皮够厚, 根本不把女人放在眼里.
他们可能不懂什么是真爱, 不懂什么是珍惜.
他们什么都不懂, 只会伤害女人.
男人永远不懂女人心.
假如我是个男人, 我一定会全心全意地去爱我的女人.
我会把最好的留给她, 把她爱的送给她.
看见她快乐, 我就心满意足了.
有时侯, 我想自己变成一个男人.
作为一个女人, 我觉得我还不到及格的标准.
但一个男人的想法很简单, 让爱人快乐幸福就足够了.
我变成男人, 我会尽最大的努力去了解爱人的想法.
女人最需要的是了解, 体谅, 包容, 与安全感.
没有这些, 即使再有钱, 再有魅力也不能全权拥有女人.
要是能让所有的男人当一天的女人,
我想他们一定能更珍惜与爱护他们的女人吧?
不生于处境, 永远无法真正了解女人的心.
人常说, " 女人心海底针"
但我认为, 男人的诚意与用心才是我们女人无法预料到的.
男人与女人, 分别有多少, 自己心理应该有点算数了吧?

CELEBRATION STARTS NOW!!!

2007-11-13T10:41:00.002+07:00

END OF 'O' LEVELS!

This means:

- end of secondary school life!

- end of torturous exams!

- end of mugging!

- end of stress!

- end of wearing school uniform!

- end of the world?!

OF COURSE NOT!

IT'S THE START OF A NEW WORLD!

Cheers!

Let's celebrate!

Midnight confessions.

2007-11-10T00:46:00.000+07:00

Why am i still up at this hour?
Haha, I've been looking up for a suitable skin for my blog.
Initially, I wanted my blog to feel gay and bright.
But sadly,I cant find any skin that fulfill the criteria i wanted.
So i put this!
Orange and cool.
I quite of love this skin!
It gives me the tranquil and serene feel.
Although i wanted a cute cute skin,
a cool and refreshing one will do the job.
I have a strong urge of posting something meaningful
but i have no ideas of what to write.
I always loved writing long long post.
Oh, before i forget to mention.
I put Hebe's version of "She's the one" again..
I totally loved that song!
Ya, i am mad, u may tink.
For the whole afternoon,
I've been busy with finding pictures of Hebe and S.H.E!
Full of their pictures in my photobucket.
Hahas.
Admiring their beauty and success in their careers is what i do.
I'm insane, mad all over them.
My friendster, my blog, my everything.
They are my life.
Without them, i dunno how to go on living.
Wahaha, sounds crazy huh?
That's the truth.
I'll always support them no matter what.
Long live S.H.E!!!

Enough of my S.H.E rantings,
now i wanna blurt emo-ness.
I dunno what to say, seriously.
I know that's nothing sensitive going on between us.
But deep in my heart,
he still lives in that special place.
I dunno how to get rid of him.
Out of my mind, my heart.
I still cant find anyone to replace him.
Not a suitable candidate i could find.
Is it my fate to be stuck like this forever?
I always thought i've put down everything, the past, the relationship...
I cheated myself and friends around me.
I dunno how to answer them.
I dun even know how to answer to my heart.
I pity myself.
It's just ridiculous, isn't it?
I dunno who is the person that will untie the knot in my heart.
But i dun tink it will be myself or him.
Our love is the past,
and the present is the absence of our hearts.
the absence of his sincerity and truthfulness.
Nothing can work out.
We cant return to the happy days,
happy memories can only fade as time goes by,
not growing stronger and clearer.
I want to create a journey, not follow blindly.
But without two sincere hearts,
the journey cant be continued.
the process of the journey will never be fruitful and meaningful anymore.
I dun wan to start a broken relationship again.
I dun wan to bring injuries that will scarred onto my heart forever.
I wan a love that will possibly last a lifetime.
i just want a love that will last.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Is that so difficult to fulfill?
I can give up anything in return of a lifetime realtionship.
Even my eyesight, my hearing, my senses...
Only the heart cant be sacrificed.
Love is to feel from the heart,
not to see from the eyes,
not to hear from the sweet rantings and whisperings,
not to smell the fragrance and scent of another's body.
Love can be so difficult to define,
people tend to take it for granted and
miss its strong powers of obssesion and possession.
Hurt will then come and hatred follows.
Why is it always like this?
Why cant a relationship end with happiness?
Maybe God makes fate seemed so easy and endings hard to accept
and so people dunno how to cherish and treasure.
it's a lesson that most of us cant managed to pass even we failed loads of times.

Cherishing is hard to learn, letting go is hard to accomplish.
Do think again.

Disappointment

2007-11-09T12:25:00.000+07:00

Is my life full of disappointment?
I diunno.
I just lose hope on everything, everyone.
I dunno what's out there for me to anticipate...
I'm going mad.
I just going to be one helpless and useless soul.
I dunno how the hell am i going to live on with my life.
I really dunno.
Somebody help me!!!

I feels like walking in a dark tunnel.
The only way to continue is to keep on walking.
In the darkness.
I dunno where it will lead me to,
so the only way is to walk on.
I cant turn back or give up.
I dunno what lies ahead of me,
I just know I've to walk on.
No matter what.
Alone.

Green tea.

2007-11-08T08:18:00.000+07:00

Green tea.
My favourite.
My memories.
My life.

That day i went to Orchard,
my lalas all there cos sem sem went there to reborn her hair.
i was eating the green tea halls candy which i bought in msia.
Suddenly a wave of the past swept over me.
I missed that taste of the candy, the taste of the past.
I didn't touch that candy ever since last year.
The most recent case was YL offered me one.
I was shocked upon seeing that.
Bet he saw my favourite stuff on my blog. bleahxD
But that time when i ate the candy,
I had no special feelings towards it.
I was amazed of the great rush that went thru me that day
I didn't know how strong my missing of the past was,
until i ate the candy.
I know to u it may seemed ridiculous,
but there will always be something that will remind u
of the past or any happy memories.
But I guess I cant return to the past bah,
even if i could, i'll be alone.
I dun tink he would wan to return.
I guess now is the best time of his life,
with all the frens he wished to be with,
study the school he wished to study.
He gets the life he wans,
gets the frens he wans.
I dun tink he would give up all these.
So i am just the only one craving to return.
I dunno how to continue my life.

Well, i guess i'll just lead on blindly in my heart,
until the real him can give me the motivation.
To continue living with my true soul.

Sian..

2007-11-07T17:09:00.000+07:00

Sorry for not posting on Monday.
My com has PMS. XD
Rainy day, midnight cant go into d net.
Sian diao...
It feels like Os are already over, hahas.
Eat, sleep, watch tv...
Nothing to do le...
I really want to do somthing meaningful, like making handmade stuff.
But my creativity jus wun fluorish. haix.
Nothing really excites me, but bores me to death.
No money no fun.
I've spent darn lots of money on my PROM DRESS.
But my lalas tink it really suits me!
hahas, tink it should worth d price.
Kilua scold me for not waiting for him to buy dress.
He could have helped me save lots of money, hahas.
But he said he would buy accessories for me to match my dress.
Thanks:)
Although i saw a bracelet online that really matches my outfit,
I still appreciates wad he promised.
Am i still pinning high hopes?
I guess so.
I dun understand why am i so dead-hearted to something,
something that may not have any purpose or meaning to it.
I dunno wad n who do i live for...
I wished that there is something or someone that i can live for.
The motivation that leads me on.
I hope it will come soon.
That's all.
I'll try to update more frequent.
bb.

Sorry...

2007-11-01T08:53:00.000+07:00

Hey peeps!
I'm so sorry for not posting.
it's been a month le.
O lvls are coming to an end!
Gee^^ 6 more pprs to go...
see i very wei da leh,
sacrifice my studying time for physics and post for those who complained..
All i could say is i seriously didn't put in my very very best for O lvl...
I tried at least to maintain my tolerance for concentrating...
haha...English, Emath anf Hmt were okay lah,
Chem was damn easy, amath and geo? dunno wad to say lor...hard?
maybe i didn't study hard enough...
next monday are Social studies and Biology...
Both need super memory to memorise...
and i only have 2 days to memorise!!!
But thinking of shopping after Monday, i feel hyper!
haha... shop for prom!!!
well, jus to mention, i opened an account with only 100 bucks inside!
lol. i gonna make sure that money keeps increasing
and not getting lesser and lesser...
Well, i'll post next monday after my Bio ppr
and when i reached home, cos my com okay le!!!
Okay, i've to stop here and go study Physics le...bye!

Cherish your gains.

2007-10-07T01:49:00.000+07:00

Sorry for not posting for so long, heex :)
Suddenly i feel sentimental, to quite a large extent..
Cos of?
Maybe i'm just feeling sad over friendships..
Maybe i'm listening to S.H.E's old songs..
Believe it or not, S.H.E's songs really accompanied me throughout my life..
Ever since they stepped into star buzz..Every of their songs represents different memories and feelings of mine.
I really envied their relationship, inside out :)
Even if this kind of relationship happens to me at the age of 60,
i am willing to wait.
Frankly, i am alone.
No one is true as my friend,
at least at the surface they are very truthful.
But not inside them.I guess at this very moment,
none of my friends will miss me in one way or another.
When i regard them as my best fren, soulmate,
it's disappointing that they never regard you as one.
Sometimes, a deep friendship fades off with time.
I hate time but treasure it at the same time.
The best frens in primary school,
we rarely have topics to talk about nowadays.
Some of my pri sch frens, lose contact for more than a year.
Worse still, meeting only once a year: teacher's day.
Very sad to say, this year, only less than half the class came back.
I was shocked.
Those regular comebacks didn't appear this year.
Well, i cant make any comments but
i believe they are doing well in secondary school..
So well that they can forget and some even
sacrifice the only time to gather as a class once a year.
People always go for new, fresh frens.
I go for old, true frens.
But i don't think any of them regard me as one true fren.
It's just up to them.
I really pray hard to get a confidant,
even if i really have to sacrifice ten years of my life. <*touch wood*>

I think no one is reading my blog =X
No one tagged.
The very recent tag is nearly about one month ago.
Pathetic hur?
Well, i may be closing down this blog soon.
After the Os, I'll be working.
Dun tink i'll have extra time to blog either.
I will really spend my time working hard
and do meaningful things to fulfill myself.
Now, the most important thing is to
concentrate and study real hard.
Some of my frens tell me that i can do it,
i myself even dun have the confidence that i can.
I really lost the motivation to work hard.
I wonder what drives me to study so hard last time.
I really have to drive myself mad to study.
I believe i can.
Do my best and more.
Haha, my school's motto.
I think it's just my mentality of fearing failure.
No matter what, this is really the last leap.
Even if i cant get real good grades,
i also must try my best to do the papers.
There are lots more to find out and discover in this society, in this world.
I may not have big dreams, but as an individual,
i believe i should play a part in this world,
no matter it is physically or mentally.
Live my life to its fullest.
Ever since i stayed in Spore for the past 4 months,
i feel that the bond between me and my family is stronger.
I tend to have lots of topics to chat with my mum,
and i will talk to my dad asking him some general things.
Unlike now, last time, there was little communication between me and my parents.
Even my sister and me have lots to talk about,
although sometimes we still quarrel :P
It is just another gain and loss at the same time.
Every two weeks of coming back is very precious,
so i always stay up late like now, to enjoy my time at home.
Treasure everyone around us,
even if you have to see him or her everyday when you open your eyes.
You never know when the same scenario may turn out
to be a tragedy the next day.
So, to everyone out there, with your loved ones,
treasure all the times together, never ever take them for granted.
Memories may mean nothing to many,
but it is indeed very precious and priceless.
Even if you have all the money in the world,
you cant purchase them if you lose them.
Cherish as if you gonna lose it the next moment.

As for relationships, i've grown alot more mature mentally.
No relationship can last long.
Maybe to most.
People change, hearts change too.
You cant confirm you will love this person forever, truly.
You wil never know the next moment you
might fall in love with another stranger or
your partner may be lying to you, cheating
your feelings all this while.
It's hard to guess what people truly thinks...
So i rather stay single.
No offence, but i am real tired of suspecting and guessing.
If he dun have the sincerity to be true in front of me,
even if i know what he thinks,
it'll be useless.
I cant control him, but i also dun wanna suffer what i have suffered last time.
I want a brand new relationship with no lies and fake feelings.
It just has to come naturally, with trust and love.
No one is being forced or unwilling.
I outgrow my childish thoughts and dreamy imaginations.
No sand castles in the air, but sand castles on the beach :)
To end, from cradle to grave,
make yourself useful and live with no regrets..

Unconditioned love.

2007-09-14T22:02:00.000+07:00

I blogging again,
dunno y but has a strong urge to write something today.
Read someone's blog archives,
found out tat tis person had lots of crushes on peeps.
I realised i was once like that too,
but that was when i was in primary school.
immature, looking at the guys i admired from afar.
Hence, i never developed deep feeling s for them
or missed them like crazy or wad.
After maturing through all these years,
i realised love cant be that generous.
When you loved someone,
it is almost impossible for you to fall in love with another person again.
This is what i truly believe.
I tried very hard to fall in love with someone,
but realised i really couldn't.
It sounds really ridiculous but it's true.
Loving someone, the feeling just would not deplete.
If it does deplete,
it shows that you are not loving the person as you thought you are.
This is my principle of love.
I cant accept someone who had been in love so many times.
Lan yong gan qing de ren wo bu xi han.
Realising that actually love is unconditioned,
remember the times i was with him,
even though he was not straight,
i still loved him no matter what.
I guessed no one will be as selfless when it comes to love.
I cant believe i did it.
I have done it.
And i'll continue doing it.
Till the day i die.
I am silly, i admit.
Who is not silly when you fall in love?
Jus hope that peeps who still hold hopes on me would give up on me, soon.
I dun wanna waste anymore of your time.
So, please stop thinking of me.
I'm not the girl you're looking for.
I'm just another fallen soul, lost in love.
Sorry, hope you can understand.

wad should i do?

2007-09-14T19:38:00.000+07:00

It'd been a long time since i blogged.
1 week le bah...
Lots of things had happened over the past 1 week.
Getting back my results is one major one, although i didn't consider that important at all.
haha.
anyway, i improved quite alot compared to mid-year exam.
english- B4 (finally!)
higher chinese- B3 (super disappointed..)
combined humanities- E8 (die liao lar...)
biology- B4 (must buck up!!)
chemistry- B3 (yeah!)
physics- C6 (it's a miracle tat i've passed!)
emath- B4 (lots of careless mistakes!)
amath- F9 (no hope liao..)
i only failed 2 subjects lor...
or should i say, die liao, failed 2 subjects leh!!!
haha...
either way i'm quite relieved lah..
at least i got improvement.
just pray hard i can do much more better for O level bah.
have to work very very hard lor..
but scare i no motivation to do that lah.
last time i felt tat there was a kind of motivation tat encouraged to study n do my very best in exam.
but now, the feeling is gone.
looks like i've to find the feeling back.
or else, my results will remain in this state.
can go either here and there.
Jiajun is helping me with English,
Weijie is helping Amath.
I just hoped that i wouldn't disappoint them.
I nearly wanted to drop Physics, but the prelim returned the hope for me.
Surprisely, i passed with a low grade though.
I have lots to catch up on in this short period of one mth plus.
Hope there's another miracle to save me.

He's irritating.
I know i shouldn't say this but he's really getting on my nerves.
I cant stand his paranoid-ness.
Always sms me mushy messages and keep asking me basic things like eating dinner.
He even asked my friend to add him on msn and gave my friend his number.
Saying tat he needs ADVICES.
Duh, wad kind of advices does he need anyway?
Obviously, he's trying to interfere into my privacy and feelings.
Wad he's doing now, really irritates me.
At first, I think he's one guy who is good to me and cares alot for me.
But now, it seems like he's not caring anymore but overconcerned till a terrible stage of annoyance.
My good impression of him is being totally wiped out now.
I can tell him in his face that, YOU CAN FORGET ABOUT ME!!!
I'll never let myself drop into this endless pit of mental tortures.
I am harsh but he's just too much.
Stop counting down and don't irritate me any further!
I don't wish anyone pop out into my life and mess up my life at this crucial point of time!
I've had enough i supposed.
Tired of all these...
I'll continue to stay single till my Mr. Right appears.
The first look determines everything.
I believe in deep affinity.
Sometimes, love cannot be forced.
It'll come naturally, nothing can stop its arrival.
My heart still hasn't give up on him bah, i believe.
I believe he'll return one day.
i can't do without him, life seemed so meaningless without him.
Really meaningless, thinking of those days we went exploring new places together;
roaming around the small island freely and happily...
Sweet memories are priceless.
I'm afraid one day i'll have memory loss and forget all these happy memories.
I'm having STM now...
So i'm just afraid the day will come...
I can lose anything but memories.
They are precious and nothing can replace them.
Everything i did with him, every moment i'd spent with him...
I still tresure them alot, hope he do treasure them too.
I am being very indecisive and it hurts many people.
I'm sorry but that's nothing i could do.
I do hope that everything goes well and no one will be hurt in the end.
Bless all.

Sorry.

2007-09-05T07:27:00.000+07:00

I've hurt someone badly.
I'm so upset abt it, but what can i do?
It would be much worse if i dun speak mty heart now...
the pain then will be worst.
Sorry is what i could say.
However, I didn't give u any promises.
I dun wish to see u being depressed and hopeless.
I wished that u could get over with it
as quick as possible and concentrate on your studies.
I dun wish to be of any burden to u,
in terms of relationship.
I know we share the same dreams and interests,
but that doesn't mean we have to get into relationship
to enjoy all those same views.
I know it's hard to find a special someone,
but i'm not YOUR special someone.
She's somewhere else on Earth, i truly believe.
I can't get myself involved with a relationship
that my heart doesn't follow to.
The feeling of it is horrible,
I don't wanna lie to u and hurt u very badly in the end.
It's not fair to u.
Honestly, I can't get myself out of the previous one.
2 and half years.
It's long and difficult to let go.
Waiting is not the solution.
I may even take years to let go.
U wanna wait? I encourage u not to.
It's a waste of time.
How do u even know that i'm the right one?
Feelings are important.
Without them, even the lifeless cant survive.
Pardon me for saying that.
Afterall, it's our choices that leads us on our way of life.
Don't everyone agree?
We get to choose and pick the startings and the endings.
Just wanna say, dun lose hope and faith.
What's yours, finally it'll be yours. takecare.

Long-lost post

2007-08-17T15:36:00.000+07:00

It's been a long time since I last posted the entry.
Now I'm in the midst of the prelim exams...
English was terrible today...
Haix...
Yesterday's english oral was not as successful as I thought it would be.
Let bygones be bygones ba...
I'll start anew...
I wonder if he'll read this but..
Wish that he'll stay happy always...
No matter what happens...
I'm glad to have loved you before.
And i'll treasure the happy and sweet memories we've had together...
i'll let go of the hatred and sadness in this relationship...
I'm going to start anew...
I believe I wouldn't disappoint you...
So you must stay happy and xingfu always...

Yl told me to open up my heart..
Not to seal myself up cuase of a failing relationship that didn't worked out...
I am trying to...
trying very hard to...
But before that, I don't think I should accept him..
i wanna taste the sweetness of being loved...
haha..
it has been a long time since i've been loved...
glad that someone is loving me now..
at this very moment...
and how i hoped he would love me forever...
if he could...
maybe i shouldn't make him wait...
maybe he might just give up on me and disappear...
i'm afraid of that happening..
i don't wanna lose the one who loved me and i loved anymore...
i missed all the insignificant actions...
that showed me that he loved me...
and i wanna return to that patch of grass again..
to enjoy the sunshine and that sweet smile of mine...
to smell the freshness of the dews and soil...
to watch the birds soaring up in the sky...
to watch every sunrise and sunset in his arms...
in the near future...
if we could be together...

maybe the pain will come eventually..
but shouldn't i just feel the love and waited to be cherished?
maybe the outcome is not a sad ending like the previous one...
maybe if we were bound to separate in the end,
the pain is not as unbearable...
maybe...
maybe i shouldn't think of the bad sides of love...
thinking of the good and sweet sides...
it may make me feel better...
feel a lot more better...
Fight for your happiness, everyone!
even if pain is bound to arrive...
treasure every loving moment...
till the love between the two of you ends...

Today was quite a relaxing day...
Tml going back Sem's house again...
Didn't even get to stay at home for more than a day...
Mum's not cooking again..
Haix..
It has been one month since I've last tasted mum's cooking...
But she helped me cokoked instant noodles..
Is that considered cooking too?
Haha..
but still miss mummy and dad....
love them lots..
although i didn't say that in front of them >.<
lol...study study study...
hope o level can end as soon as possible...
i wanna go out and play!
i wanna enjoy tan lian ai again!
haha...
stressed up lor...
but no choice wad..
i'm still thinking of which course to go...
there is one which i am quite interested..
culinary and catering management in temasek poly..
so far wor...
but if he going there too..
i don't mind the distance...
heehee...
i seemed so unconcerned about my future...
wonder if i am stuck in my dreamland for too long a period...
help me out!
think i've got nothing more to say le ba...
sayoonara!

sorry...

2007-07-06T19:49:00.000+07:00

i'm sorry that i hasnt been posting since holidays ended.

my computer spoiled

sem's computer spoiled at the same time

lol sian

everyday reach home at 5pm after focus study

slack like hell

haix

lonely

nothing to do.

but i'm trying to adapt to the new life at sem's hse.

good progress

hope can stay till poly life ends.

i'm gettin lazy

no motivation to study

i need something too keep me going

i dunno who can help me

i just know that

i'm dead

the true me is dead

i jus hope someone

that unique guy

that has the ability to dig me out

speaking of the unique one

that day chatted wif YL

talked abt our dream

we haf the same dream of travelling around the world

with our loved one

i wonder if i can really find 'him'

and whether i haf the capital to last me for 2 decades

to travel around the world

to feel the world

the world is going to be demolished with our own hands

sooner or later

i haf to make use of the remaining time i've got to see the true world

with the special 'him'

together to help the world in any way

be it environmentally or financially

romantic yet meaningful

sad to say that i hate petty guys and those very proud kind

disgusting

tink if tis goes on

i'll become lao chu nv le

old virgin

haha

lol

fed up with those hatings and scoldings

cant understand why ppl like to hate

and scold like there's no tml

waste breath and time

and brain cells to tink of words and phrases to scold

haix

why not lead a simple life

that's y the world is in a mess

terrorism

conflict

argument

debates

quarrels

all bcos of hatred and impatience

forget abt tat.

i'll end here.

feel free to tag!

take care and enjoy life!

holidays sucks!

2007-06-22T10:03:00.000+07:00

Hey i'm back! Haiz...

chiong my homework now...

i've spent 2 days watching "E Zuo Ju Zhi Wen"...

a very nice and romantic show...

the male lead and the female lead are cute!

I'm still in holiday mood lol...

no mood to do homework...

sianz....

but i've difficulty finishing my post cos this keyboard de printing all gone le...

cant see the letters...

my com at home cant access internet.

It's a torture man...

my mp3 also spoil liao...

i wan new mp3!

nice songs too!

200 pounds beauty de songs..

.e zuo ju zhi wen de songs too!

ahh..

tml going to celebrate tingshien's bdae...

with hongwei and yuensee too...

later have to chiong all the homework...

tink i dun wan to write anymore le.

bye.

enjoy these last 3 days of holidays!

Back At Home.

2007-06-08T21:19:00.000+07:00

I fell in love with a guy wearing purple-striped top.

Purple is the universal colour for gays.

As many think.

But to me, it is not.

It represents lust, romance and love.

I always feel my heart racing when i saw somebody
who has a familiar side view, just like him.

My heart skipped a beat.But when he turns and i could see his face,

It is not him.

Am I in love?

I guess not.

I can't really explain.

Is it because deep down inside

My heart has hardened?

Whenever I pass by the places we went before,

I used to recall all the beautiful memories

We had together.

But now,I feel nothing at all.

Then why should I be afraid to go there?

I am afraid it will awake all the heart-brokening yet
loving memories.

Should I go?

Maybe my tears will fall,

maybe my heart will ache.

Let all the sadness and happiness that I've once had,

be begones.

I could not bear to carry them along.

It is really a burden.

Sometimes, time cannot heal wounds.

They are just too deep to heal fully.

So I choose to cut off the part of wounded flesh

And discard off.

Away it will decompose and rot.

New flesh will grow.

New blood will flow.

The heart will once again beat to a new rhythm.
Finally I'm back home.

How homesick can I be?

I was totally freaking out the whole day today.

During Physics lesson.

Worse still, practical was dragged for an hour more.

Hate it.

I literally had no mood listening to any talking.

I rushed all the way to the interchange

after leaving Sem's house.

Squeezed onto the bus.

Stomping my foot when the queue was damn long.

Actually it wasn't long.

I was so afraid that I would miss the bus.

Scare that Dad would already be waiting there.

Called him and knew he had not reach.

Whew.

Reached and bought a packet of low fat milk.

Drank and started looking around for Dad's
presence,he reached and off we go.

Didn't have chance to taste Mum's dishes today.

She's busy, no time to cook dinner.

Eating take-away again.

Been the third time this week.

Oily and fattening.

But I liked Sem's breakfast!

Toast bread with scrambled egg.

Half-cooked egg with 2 sausages.

Green tea too!

Liked her Auntie's cooking too!

Soup is just nice, veggie is tasty too.

She kept forcing me to eat meat.

Haha.

We had lots of laughter on the dining table.

Jokes and craps.

Especially yesterday.

Stupid Andrew.

Crapping freak.

Made crazy noises.

Haha.

Laughed like mad.

Nearly choked on the rice.

Lotsa of fun.

But very tired of lessons.

Wasting time only.

From 8am to 3.30pm everyday.

Pekchek.

Hate my mp3 too.

The stupid cable cant work on Sem's com.

Now my com too.

Walau.

Irritating.

Hate irritating ppl too.

Keep talk n talk like no tml.

F*ck them lar.

Asking the same question again n again.

As if my meals are their concerns.

I CAN FEED MYSELF!!!

Even if I dun haf money to eat,

I rather starve to death.

I dun nid any sympathy.

STOP ASKING!

GET LOST AND OUT OFF MY SIGHT!!!

Why cant decent ppl talk to me?

I hate kpo ppl.

Dun let me see you ever again.

Okay.

I am going off to watch TV le.

Ending here.

Take care everyone.

Emptiness.

2007-05-25T19:45:00.000+07:00

Today was Parents' Meeting Session.

Once a year.

Nothing much to comment on.

They jus told me to work hard and buck up

during the holidays.

that's wad i'm going to do.

No need to repeat that again n again.

Sianx lor.

My results overall was better.

Addmath C6

Elemath D7

Chemistry D7

Physics E8

Combined Humanities E8

English C6

Higher Chinese B3

Biology A2

Ya, the only A i've gotten.

Glad that i didn't fail 5.

L1R5- 32

L1R4- 24

pathetic.

if 'O' lvl i gonna get tis.

I'm going to die.

By jumping downfrom my school's highest building.

I agreed wif Sem.

I can really find no reason to laugh now.

We are just too stressed up, I believe.

I hoped it's just that.

If not, even after the 'O's,

I dare to say that we would never laugh again.

We are going to be in a laughless society from now on.

Why?

I dunno.

Sad to say.

But we really are in it.

I hoped i'm still a child.

I can still find reasons to laugh about.

Life isn't all about laughing.

I know that.

But life without laughter.

It's nothing.

Learn to smile and laugh everyday.

We really must.

Or else we'll become robots.

Emotionless humans.

That's not what i want to be.

Jia you orh!

Those who are taking their 'O' Chinese next monday!

Ganbatte!

Nothing more to say.

Bye.

Disappointed.

2007-05-20T13:42:00.000+07:00

I had expected the results.

That's why i didn't cry in school.

In fact, i laughed at my results...

failed 5 subjects...

it is scary to other ppl honestly...

but i am immune now...

i didn't expect any miracle that i might just

strike an A1 for any of the subjects, not even Chinese.

I got a B3.

The best subject.

I just dun tink it is worth crying for.

I didn't put in any effort frankly speaking.

With so much things to be done and performances just before the exam,

i doubt anybody will make it a good one either.

But i still cried when i reached home,

when i was eating my dinner halfway.

I couldn't help tinking i had disappointed my parents.

I just couldn't help it.

I dun wish to make them sad or angry

although they dun really show much care and concern

towards my studies.

But i know they wouldn't never wish that i did badly for exams.

I am so guilty.

I wished i could do something which make them

and myself proud like how i scored so well in primary school

and they saw me going on stage to receive trophy and vouchers.

I yearned for that feeling of being watched and

the sense of happiness when u have done something above expectations.

I missed that feeling.

Yesterday, went out with Hong Wei, Ting Shien and his girlfren, Yuen See.

A sweet girl indeed.

I know her.

I just knew she would come.

I expected that.

Haha.

That Ting Shien forced me to treat them Sakae Sushi.

Damn it.

In the end, we ate at Pastamania.

Wasted an hour plus at Timezone

waiting to play the games.

But those ppl jus wun stop.

Haix.

Went to Ting Shien's house and ate dinner.

Yuen See came back from church and we sang K at Hong Wei's house.

Not very high lor.

Maybe we are just not very close.

But she loved S.H.E just like ME and Hong Wei!

Ting Shien is just an extra one lar.

Some more he still dare to insult my favourite singers.

Stupid.

But seriously, he has a good voice.

But he wasted it lar.

Hong Wei too!

He knows a bit of Beatboxing!!!

I was totally amazed!

Didn't know they have such hidden talents

within them.

Cool...

I want to stay in Spore!

cant tahan the travelling.

Tired and restless.

Discuss with parents le.

Should be successful bah.

Pray hard for me!

That's all bah!

Take care!

2007-05-15T12:38:00.001+07:00

These are the photos from new albums and outfits.

Some shots from the mtv-'wu yue tian'.

Aren't they gorgeous?

Stress-free

2007-05-15T10:55:00.000+07:00

Guess what?

I woke up 11.15am today!

I had a wonderful sleep...

Yesterday went to watch Spiderman 3.

Nice lor..the animation effects and all those cool moves of Spidey...

hahaha....

Abit sian now lor...nothing much to do...

Sian de lor...

Keep listening to S.H.E's new album-PLAY

oh my god...i'm obsessed with the songs....

they have lots of songs of genre ranging from pop to rock and r&b...

they are the only group tat i wished to listen their r&b and rock or even hio-hop.

i did mention bah?

i dun like those rock and hip-hop songs de...

esp like those western rock band...

dun even know what de heck they singing..

no offence lar...

haha...

i LOVE them!!!

but i'm sad that i din own any album of their

from the 1st debut album to the 6th one...

only started buying from Encore 7th album...

last time i still in primary school...

not much money to buy mah...

now got sell also very expensive..

become treasure le lor...

nvm..i'll still love them as much!

Esp HEBE!

muacks...

I'll be posting alot of pictures...

wait for awhile and enjoy...

S.H.E !!!

2007-05-12T20:33:00.000+07:00

YEAH!!! Finally!!! MY S.H.E NEW ALBUM!!! Hahahah...went to school early in the morning, thought Ms Fu can help us with some hard questions on Chemistry. But too bad she didnt entertain us at all...said Mr Cheong wouldnt like it if he knows we approached Ms Fu and not him, and she doesnt like to have conflicts with him...what the...Do people always have to cut the line so clear? It wouldnt die to ask a question or two bah...lol...she kept asking us to call or msg Mr Cheong...it's not that we dun want Mr Cheong to teach...it's just more convenient as other people from other class had asked Ms Fu to help..we just dun wish to bother Mr Cheong too much...haix..in the end, Sem, peng n nerdy went to eat mac breakfast at cwp. den we went to the library, went to the 2nd floor to look for the rest...includes Liping, Thrina, Jiamin and Esther they all...very quiet i should say, till i can felt a sense of horror in it...hahah...we went to the 3rd floor and started studying but i got affected by nerdy's burping...haha...he has a small stomach i say...abit of food he cant tahan liao...haha...jkjk...we brought bubble tea up too...and so suai...got caught by librarian...i tink it's the cctv bah...straight above me sumore lor....haha...in the ned i went into the toilet and drank everything up in just one gulp..hahha..i wun waste de..wakaka...
Everyone is targeting at Zhan Peng n Li Ping lor...keep helping them 牵红线...at the thought of it, it was funny de lor...haha...they are not abashed either...maybe they both already *uh-u-noe* liao lar..hahaha....but they both really make a couple...cute cute one...hahah....we left the both of them enjoy their makan time and escaped to somewhere else...
I went to retrieve my album...sad to say, i dun really like the gift lor...only a notebook type de 自拍手扎..sianx...with only less than 20 pictures and dumped lots of pieces of blank paper for me to scribble arh? lol...should have chosen the jigsaw puzzle with cd de gift...AHH!!! 后悔极了...oh man...den the exclusive DVD only includes mtvs from the previous album 'FOREVER'...haix i was totally disappointed lor...wanna watch 中国话 and 五月天 de mtv leh...haix...nvm i try watching on youtube lor...but i really LOVE the 11 songs inside!Wow...been listening to it manymany times le...got one song very unique...named 借口...sounds familiar bah? it was the same name of one of Jay's song...the 味道 of the song is vey Jay-ish...lyrics with many of Jay's famous songs...nice....love it...now i still learning 中国话 de lyrics...actually i should say it's tongue twister lar..only one paragraph of singing part...other is all tongue twisters of some famous chinese rhymes and some rapping....nice...dunno why so many ppl dunno how to appreciate it...五月天 is also another nice song...love the tune of it...nice leh...got one cute song named 老婆, means wife lar..haha...written by Selina and composed by Ella..cute song..Hebe also written a song, 说你爱我..nice too...another song with the tune of 'London bridge is falling down'...cute lor...overall it's nice lar..but i not very 满意 with the package...the pictures all very small and not very appealing leh...mixed in orange and blue...weird weird de hor? haha..but pf course our 主角, are pretty and cute!

I can FLY!

2007-05-11T11:35:00.000+07:00

Well...exams are over for some of you, but not me...I am having my last paper on next MONDAY. CHEMISTRY, with 25 chapters to hull onto....oh man....Today's addmath paper sucks like hell...I cant even do a thing leh...if i can get 10 out of 80, i would proud of myself lar...I promised Chuan Whai and Pau Xian, if i din get F9 for addmath i would treat them a meal! haha...is tat considered consoling myself? walau...this time i really gone mad studying and mugging...read my previous post? Sometimes, stress can really drive you crazy!
Sianx lor...today i forget to bring the card to retrieve my SHE NEW ALBUM!!! stupid me...sad lor...affected my mood to do the paper also lor...sianx de lor...
Haven watch Spiderman 3 yet...aso wanna watch 200 pounds beauty too...sis said it was nice...haha..but watch in spore very expensive lor...maybe watch in msia bah...sorry to anyone whom i said wanna watched with u orh...must save money lar...paiseh...
I find life very very boring...everyday after exam, go home and mug or slack...sianx...life without love is sian de lor...haha...see ppl with bf or gf..very xian mu lor....haha...but let nature take its course bah...
tired..but still wanna play audi...kk lar..jiayou for chemistry ooh!

Insane.

2007-05-06T18:11:00.000+07:00

Do u know what someone will do if he/she goes mad? U should have a try of getting insane...It was yesterday when i really had the feeling of insanity. I was lying on bad with some of my Physics stuff lar..i was like slacking the whole day lor...trying to get Physics de stuff into my mind...den my BLOODY hell sister was hitting the table with her drum sticks for percussion...PURPOSELY...i was listening to music at the same time from the computer...i tink she was angry with me for not letting her play audition...so she did that...i was trying veryvery very hard to CONCENTRATE....and i told myself to TAHAN...but i lost...i lost my temperand went insane.
I grabbed a belt and went out of the room and whacked my sister right at her face...i tink she wasn't aware of my presence. I caught her by surprise bah...She defended and hit me back with her sticks....I whacked and whacked non-stop...with my mind clearly conscious...i guessed i knew what i was doing was TOTALLY WRONG...but i couldnt stop...i WAILED upon hitting her...i couldnt stand it...i screamed and wailed so loudly that i broke down...i felt a sharp grasp of pain...my sister ran away and fell to my bed...and found out that i had injured my finger...my nail was so long that it nearly chipped off from the inner part while i was whacking with the belt...it was bleeding in the nail...hurt alot...still got blue-black inside lor...lol...this is the first time that i did something so insane....and out of my mind...
I guess i AM REALLY STRESSED UP bah....I AM!!! i dunno what to do...nothing gets into my mind even i sit there mugging for more than an hour...god it really driving me crazy...wahahaa...i tink for the rest of the subjects i will really dead bah...whatever...i dun wanna care anymore....
Today i went back to SGM Renaissance Choir...everyone was happy that i am back...but it feels abit strange...like everyone is more conserved towards me...but still glad to see them...sang old songs and a new mexican song..nice rhythm....then after dismissal...we went for lunch cos later at 2pm there was another practice for the kids....including my dumb dumb brother....haha...all the kids seemed so tiny lor...all very quiet and reserved...wahaha....but their voices quite okay lar...teacher let us watched some videos on singing choral music...nice...there was a French boys youth choir in the movie...wow...it was fantastic! The solo boy's voice was so angelic and sweet lor!!! Pray hard that one day i could sing like him...haha....wish that day will really come true...
hahaha...nothing more bah...just pray hard i wouldnt go insane again...omg...kk lar...time for me to mug again...slack too at the same time...bye, all the best for exams...

Stressed up...

2007-05-03T18:27:00.000+07:00

Memorising social studies notes now...haix...cant get them into my mind yet...die liao...still busy writing out notes for the last 3 chapters in Biology...thanks to Jie Ling for the biology book on learning examples! Q!uite hepful in the sense that Mrs Tee is the setter of this paper and she often use the book for reference in setting questions...haha...
Today's HMT paper was terribly tough lor....god...and was freezing cold in the hall...with 19degrees on for more than 15 sets of air-conditioners...wahahah....good thing is we wouldnt be sweating in humid weather during exams but we will be frozen to death when its raining like as today for the secong paper....lol.....haix..haven started revising the rest of the subjects for maths, physics, geography and chemistry...lol...brain dead ler lor....stress leh....its only the second paper for MYE...kill me bah...i tink my both addmath n elemath wan dan liao bah....wakakas....let nature takes its course bah...jiayou orh everyone!
Tomorrow is a special day to me, as least maybe to him too. 3 years since the day we started... and we cant withstand hard times through 3 years which I really hoped we could. I've seen new couples and pld ones breaking and patching...understanding how they are feeling...cos i myself had been through that for like so many times in just one relationship...haha...tink i expert liao arh...nonono...i cant call myself that...haha...just my innocence to stupid ways of keeping relationship intact when it is already torn....but cheers to Sem and Gz, Ts and Ys who just patched...Sz and Jh, my sis n her bf, Cw n u-noe-who, Sc and his baobei, and any couples whom I know lar...To those who secretly love someone deeply...for some whom I know, xin ku le....if it's worthwhile...keep holding on...if it's not...let go...there are better ones out there. Jiayou orh!!! Wish everyone tian tian mi mi and yong yuan xingfu!!!

Tired but honoured to be...

2007-04-28T22:43:00.000+07:00

Today was RSS's 20th anniversary celebration. And also my last choir performance in Riverside as a student. It was indeed very memorable, the speeches given by Mr Bala and Mrs Pang really touched my heart. I hope the juniors can do as well or can even be better than us. 2 more days to MYE, me still slacking lor..tomorrow have to start mugging le....haix...tired lor...after syf and today's performance...after that will have focus study and evening academy...long hours of revision and studying...
I dozing off le lor...haha...short post for today...paiseh hur...also got nothing much to comment about...haha...nitex

Laziness kills me...

2007-04-25T19:01:00.000+07:00

I dunno what to say...laziness has taken over my soul...i am afraid this moment...if this continues, i dunno what will become of me...Ignoring homeworks and neglecting revisions....i dun wish to...but i cant help it but to...i lost interest in revising...once i see books and notes...my head hurts...god...someone help!
Well, i tink Ms Choo is not going to come back anymore. She has her own life and lots of school for her to teach...maybe it would be better for her to leave...The school is under-paying her...the more she should...u must be tinking that i'm so ignorant...but u are wrong...i am no longer in choir...stepping down...feeling glad and sad at the same time...glad, cos i no need to waste time singing when i can spend time playing and maybe, revising my work...sad, cos i realised there are juniors out there tat will shed tears if we leave...i am afraid i would cry on the farewell party itself....i am just too emotional lar...Chuan whai said there will be one at Sentosa...in the midst of planning...hope everything turns out well...i was tinking, isnt tis supposed to be the new committee's job? oh my god..i am so afraid tat choir would collapse in the hands of the new committee...haix...everyone seemed uninterested in singing anymore...cry...well whatever it is, i shall not interfere with the stuff of choir ever again...
Glad tat maybe i will still return to TAS, so i will get to meet Ms Choo some other day...i am returning to my SGM choir after the mid-yr..i tink i mentioned it...nvm den...missed LeLe, William korkor, Guo Hua uncle and many more.....haha...suddenly feel a real urge to go back in the hands of SGM...i missed Ruiling, Ivy and Waner's family too....such warm feeling i had when going to the meetings and performances with SSA.....hope i can really give my best to them....hope Colin still continues to strive hard in SSA...i was real worried when Chuan whai mentioned about sensing things and he hads the ability...he is discussing it again...with those ppl i know who....he seemed inactive with the meetings in SSA...haix...i had spent so much effort last time to bring him in...afraid tat one day he would just be " denatured "..by those stuffs....praying hard tat he wouldnt...
Okay lar....so much of stupid stuffs...have to go do chemistry hw and revise abit le...take care ooh..good luck for mye...

恋爱为何物?

2007-04-22T16:48:00.000+07:00

昨天读了一本小说,<< 树顶上的红苹果 >> 是一个爱情小说.
故事里的男主角也同时在阅读一则网络上的日记, 名为<< 树顶上的红苹果 >>.
这是一个属于一位女生的日记,在日记里她把每一天发生的点点滴滴记录下来.
而这男主角却莫名其妙地爱上她的日记.
男生每天晚上一定准时开启电脑阅读她的日记.
他和她有着一些共通点:
喜欢喝Bacardi Breezer,
喜欢天堂鸟,
喜欢葡萄酒冰淇淋,
喜欢<<蓝地球>>, 喜欢....
有一个人伴着一起走过每一天;
喜欢两人依偎着一起看电影;
喜欢简单平静的感情.
但男生有一个相处了七年的女朋友.
女朋友喜怒无常,男生时时刻刻都必须迁就她,毕竟和她一起也有七年的时间了.
可是,两人在一起久了便会变成依赖...
连最基本的尊重也可能没有了.
男生无可奈何,但也不忍心提出分手.
最后,他们还是分手了.
男生和红苹果相遇并相恋.

从这故事里,我领悟了一个道理.
恋爱其实是一种负担.
尤其是在一起久了...
激情淡化了...
剩下责任与不舍...
难维持下去的感情
终究会结束.
为何要那么辛苦呢?
不适合就放手...
不要拖泥带水
不要浪费青春
寻找下个更好的...
让自己幸福把....

Touched....

2007-04-21T17:57:00.000+07:00

Sianx....Rahda has been giving us lots of past year school papers for us to do as revision...damn lots lor...i dun care le lar...too lazy to finish them...haix..went to chemistry lesson in the morning...tired seh...and the class was so noisy tat i screamed at kennerd n wilson...buey tahan liao lor...Mr cheong aso din say anything abt it...tink he was glad tat i screamed at them too...nowadays guys are just as talkative and bitchy...even more than gals lor....cant stand it...irritating people that made me lose concentration during lesson...hate them lots....after tat went cwp wif jieling....did sum hw at d library and went to makan...walked walked around then went home le..sian lor....haha...btw, to jie ling: 'i found yr blog le!' dun scold me kkaes? hee...
I was touched when i went to Gek Teng and Yuen Lam's blogs...2 of my juniors in choir...too bad they are not from sop section...but i was really touched...nearly cried...they ACTUALLY wanted to CRY as we are going to step down soon! Well...i tink no one will even bother whether we are in choir anot and how much we gave our hearts and souls into choir for these past 4 yrs....no one, practically....and some can even xing zai le huo when we got Silver for SYF...mei liang xin...Yuen Lam even said she missed having choir practice...seriously, i never met a junior like her who actually feel sad when there isnt any prac....which is exactly like ME!!! haha....i really feel sad and empty if i missed any choir practice...or i dun sing for one day....i intended to go back to SGM's choir after the MYE...cong shi cong shi myself after stepping down...hope choir can really go on without us....sad to leave....jiaoyu orh, my dear juniors....love ya lots....
I haven touched any revision for MYE. That is really scary. With only less than 10 days to MYE and more than 8 subjects, more than 16 chapters for each chap to revise on....i HAVE NOT DO A THING. die...feel really like giving up on studying and taking exams...tired of all these....but tis is reality...i still have to accept...haix...i shall just wait for days to pass and me to get old and die...life is totally meaningless...

chinese post.

2007-04-20T20:54:00.000+07:00

这时的我感触良多,好想写出所有自己的感受...
相信大家都知道一个在大学射杀同学的韩国籍学生吧?
他因为看不爽那些有钱的贵家子弟而产生了妒嫉与怨恨,所以精神一时失控而谋杀无辜的同学们.
为什么人类会沦落到这种地步呢?
是世界改变了他们,还是他们改变了自己?
本是同根生,相煎何太急?
有时我真的不明白人的七情六欲和喜怒哀乐,何时能化为伤人,甚至是杀害人的一种原因与动机...
爱能化成恨,世间还有什么没有可能呢?
让人感到遗憾的是,知道自己一直在伤害对方却不愿收手...
一直继续伤害,永无停息之日.
爱恨情仇,复杂又难解...
我一向喜欢简单,不做作...还蛮坦率,直接...
但从来没有刻意伤人,我只想得到永恒的友谊.
但人心难以猜测,及少会遇到和你称心如意的那一位.
幸运的话,你会遇到. 不然,即使你找遍全世界也找不着.
爱情也是如此,只要找到那个对的人...一切都会变得美好...
爱情不会是永恒的,因为我们有一天也会死.
没有所谓的天长地久,也没有完成得了的承诺.
可以说它是个谎言,也是个梦幻里的情景.
既真实,却难以捉摸.
你明白它吗?
我不明白,从来也不明白...
直到我真正遇见爱情为止.
我是相信真爱的存在, 但是否能遇到, 我自己也不晓得...
所以,遇到了就要珍惜.
还没的话,继续努力寻找吧!
在世界的某个角落,有一个人可能在等待着与你相遇并相恋...
我深深相信那个人的存在,所以我会一直等待他的出现.
让自己幸福吧!

It is finally over...

2007-04-17T21:49:00.000+07:00

Silver was what we deserved. I cried when the results was announced, i cannot take it. Tears were dripping down, bet my make-up looked horrendous...Hila and Zel also sobbed...the rest arh...cant be bothered bah...Mrs Pang comforted me and Zel..but the more comfort from her the heavier i cried...the tap was like never trying to stop....so i grabbed hold of a pack of tissue paper from Colin's bag and started wiping away...Gave one to Hila, hope he wouldn't mind...He gave me a comforting hug too....i really needed one...the more indifferent i saw the choir members were, the more sad i was....i gave my best on stage...and i believed most of the seniors did too especially Hila and Zel although she forgotten one of her lines...she cried lar but i didnt blame her at all..hope Ms Choo wouldn't too...I cried not because we didnt managed to get gold....it was because i knew our standard has dropped compared to the High Silver we've gooten two years...it was obvious...the attitudes and the sounds...i dun wished to mention names...but there were really people going really off-pitch on stage which should not happened to any of us....i think if Brenda or Pei Qi were to come and watched us...I will really break down...I was already very stressed up on the way there....just sat there looking out of the window in a daze....Until the moment i stepped off from the stage....i loosened up abit...but it didnt really helped...tensed up all the way until the results were announced...well...it is no use mulling over it now...it is over...and i can really heave a sigh...i will be out of choir after this month...after the 20th anniversary performance....thank god....finally i will be free....
Haix...missed school the whole day today....bet there is going to have alot of homework and stuff for me to catch up on....tomorrow is Physics test lor...haven even study..dun bother lar..just let it fail..i have no choice and no time...dying liao...Mid-year is one week plus away only..and i haven even done any revision by now yet....forget about it...i going to enjoy the rest of today to sleep..haha..bye...

Tomorrow is SYF!

2007-04-16T18:56:00.000+07:00

Wow...time really flies...tml is SYF le...xin ku le for so long, finally the day has come. I'm so excited yet worried...everyone has high expectation for us...expecting us to get gold...if we can doit, well....it would be real good...but if we are still at silver standard...i have really nothing to say...Mrs Pang came in to see us...she told us about singing with passion and with enjoyment....throw everything else behind our minds....i wished i could do that..but can i? i was so pissed off by the guys in the choir....they seemed to be very carefree at this stage of time...oh my god..i cant get enough of them...giggling and all sorts of funny and lame things from them...not serious about the competition at all...i screamed and shouted...but all to deaf ears...nearly hoarsed my throat....man...it was frustrating...after the 20th anniversary, that is the time i can really get out of the tedious practices of choir...Another good news! No school for CHOIR tml!!! haha....Mrs Pang said de lor...good right? finally i can rest...my shoulder hurts now...very painful lor...now i'm at Cerlyn's house...lazy to go home lar...wondering how my sister did for her Chinese dance SYF today...hoope they gotten a gold....waiting for her good news! tired from singing..later still have to do my homework....sianx....kk lar..enough of this...everyone must jia you for tml ooh!!!

Spendthrift,is tat me?

2007-04-14T20:57:00.000+07:00

I think i am not as spendthrifty as i had described myself as.....i bought a new CASIO watch and a new bag today...spent about nearly 50bucks....to u it may be a small sum...but to me, it costs me the last bit of my pay le lor...sad...but i get to buy what i wan...still very happy lar...mum screamed at me for wasting so much money...paiseh...i gonna be broke very very soon...
Zelzel asked me a question in the noon today..."Do u wish to have a boyfren now?" Of course, it is a 'YES' lar...still have to ask meh....haha...but not as despo lar...just feeling very kou xu these days without a bf....my phone almost can go into hibernation for a week...jus feel very sian and so lonely...it's just sad lar...not to the extend of flirting lor..i would never do tat...maybe i will consider being single for my whole life, as in not to get married....in this way i wouldnt be financially burdened....haha...can lead a peaceful life...but deep down my heart there will always be an empty space...it can never be filled...the lack of love makes me lose my motivation too..should i say tat? i literally gave up doing homework....exhausted by the tedious timetable every week...remedials after remedials..facing strangers everywhere i go....no one to speak my mind to...it's a scaring feeling...imagine everyone in this world speaks english and you're the only speaks chinese or other mother tongue? this analogy may sounds weird lor...it's difficult to describe the feeling...leading my life messily...dun even know the purpose of doing homework and exams...i am just too tired of all these....give me a break!

Obsessions...

2007-04-12T19:03:00.000+07:00

I am obsessed with my choir dress....haha...today just gotten the coat for the whole costume...i was amazed by the Cina knot at the front...it really looked unique...people complained lar of course, as usual....ugly lar...disgusting lar...these people dunno hoe to appreciate things...take them for granted....haix...nowadays keep sitting in front of the computer...watsing my time....the house has been very quiet without my other 2 sisters..lol....some pictures for u all to see lor...

`this is the CINA knot i was talking about....unique rite?

`i am wearing it!

`this is how my dress looked......

`self-obsessed with the dress....hahaha.....

5 more days to SYF.....i very stressed up...chuan whai also can see lor...hope things can get better as soon as possible...after the 20th anniversary, i will be more ease...if not i will start screaming and crying for no reason....seesh.....think i may just give up studying by going to poly after i graduate...i am tired of all those formulaes and theories to memorise and practice....god....i am half dead....someone, anyone...help!

Stress arh....

2007-04-11T21:10:00.000+07:00

Lol...been singing for nearly 5 hours non-stop for choir this afternoon. Tired, sleepy....but i still move on...rachel said i looked tired but in my mind i am not tired at all...i bear with all noise and nonsense from the members....i really can be awarded the most patient singer in choir....during the very first part of choir, Ms Choo hadnt reach yet...they wanted to do octec (is it spelled like tat?) singing..horrendous is wad i can described them! i really was very angry and DISAPPOINTED. I cried leh....tears filled anger flowed down uncontrollably.....i dunno why....Samuel was startled by crying bah...paiseh leh....really cant take it...got some even sang OUT OF TUNE ....OMG....only 6 DAYS to SYF leh...i dunno wad to tell them already...fed up....i tink most of the choir members dunno how to appreciate their voice and the music we sing. I really can feel the flow and emotion in the songs...be it a sad love song or a happy joyous song....if u really listen, the beautiful notes can really make your hair stand....goosebumps all over..i am not lying...but alot of them jus sing for the sake of singing....it's just a pity that they dunno what is appreciation for music. For the next three hours, Ms Choo smoothened the songs by adding colour, texture and dynamics....it was well done but still, it can alot more better. If we had the passion like Mansjuri, the stage presentation like HaiSing Catholic, we can get GOLD. We have techniques and perfect pitches....but there is no support and connection at all....Dull is the word to describe our singing style.....i dunno what to say leh...jus take care of yourself, choir members....please i beg you, put in MORE EFFORT and EXPRESSION!!!! I believe if everyone does this, we can really get GOLD. It's our heart and mind that decides our fate...so rethink again....
For those non-syfers, i really wanna thank you for yr patience and yr 'noise'....though sometimes is real loud....Seriously, i really hate those ppl who thinks tat choir is the best cca for slacking...if u are one of them, warning: GET OUT OF CHOIR AT ONCE!!! We dun need slackers and attitude problems immature kids in our choir. For goodness sake, we are a SILVER standard choir. Not a COP standard. Please, if u wanna slack then u better die off and dun ever come back. Life is for us to strive hard and achieve, not for u to slack with. Wasting yr life? Why not kill yrself? Save others.
Oh my god....only 2o+ days to mid-year, and guess wad? I still haven touch a single thing for revision. Maybe it will just be the end of the world for me....Schedules are full with practices, focus studies, napfa test and all sorts of rehearsals for the 20th anniversary. Waste my time only....i really want time. I cant catch up the fast pace of life, but still i have to live on. I cant kill myself and die off from this world. The only thing i can do is to live on. Smile. Wadever tat happens, jus smile. Sunshine comes after every shower. I believe things will just get better for me. Life is never easy for anyone. Live the best out of yr life. One life, live it..

exam exam and exam...

2007-04-10T20:59:00.000+07:00

Haha...i've changed my blog skin again! Dun scold me orh, zelzel! Actually i've been feeling very moody and restless...keep sleeping during lessons....sorry teachers, i didnt mean to...seriously...i am very tired...i feel that i dun have the energy to go on anymore...maybe after Syf i will just drop dead....speaking of Syf...the people who are incapable are being kicked out...a pity lar..but hope they understand....7 more days to SYF! my vocal hasnt been improving since last week...still abit hoarse lor...haix..have to hao hao bao yang le! Zelzel, dun eat fried and oily food liao lor...tahan one more week den can eat till we like, okay? must ting hua lor... My 2 sisters have to stay in Spore for a week...due to some reasons which i'm lazy to explain, wanna know just come ask lor...so shuang siax..can have the whole bed...hahahaha.....and no one to fight the computer with me, exceot for my brother...but we negotiate things lar...haha...bit lonely lor...but atill can adapt to the silence in the house.... Been in love with the song "She's The One" re-sung by Hebe from S.H.E. at their concert. It's nice though...the original version was sung by Robbie Williams but i havent heard that before. Thank you Xf and Cg for helping me to find tat song although they didnt manage to. Thanks for the effort! Been feeling empty too....maybe i'm lacking love....Love is one of the vitamins in our life....We cant live without it, if not we will have some kind of defiency disease?! haha...ppl tend to fall into depression when they are are just lonely and out of love...lol... Sianx .....struggling over tests and revisions...dying soon...with so many rehearsals packing in weeks and after SYf there is the 20th anniversary performance by choir too....2 full-dress rehearsals which we are expected to stay from 6pm to 9pm lor! walau ehh...haix....i also lazy to do revision and homework though...i am known for my laziness! haha...Doubt i will make it for O level....haha...maybe i would get a 18 pointer and go poly! haha..or maybe like what Jieling told me, Gavin got 19 and got into Pioneer Jc...wow...that's amazing leh....maybe...maybe...maybe...i will die before O level?! haha...nonsense lar....jus bear with it.....lol....
Okay lar..i going off soon...sleep well everyone! sweet dreams!

sian de lor.....

2007-04-07T23:05:00.000+07:00

Thank god that i didnt went mute! My voice came back today after lots of crapping...haha...this morning went to choir practice...Zel zel not here cos seh gpt physics lesson with ms tan...haix...i was really pissed off by the singing today, TOTALLY. goodness, we are not even up to our usual SILVER standard. I really cant stand those complacent singers in the choir, almost all of them i can say...They are just so IGNORANT about what is going to come and what to expect. Due to my hoarse voice today, i didnt manage to sing in my full voice and i really felt bad. Sorry Ms Choo. Horrendous singing. Oh my god, i cant even believe that we were once a SILVER choir! I nearly burst into tears of anger during the rehearsal. I kept wiping off tears in my eyes, if anyone had even notice tat. I was so emotionally unstable at that moment of this when i heard the sopranos singing the solo part of Ca The Yowes. There wasnt any resonance and support at all. I shut my mouth and didnt sing cos Ms Choo asked me not to. But i was depressingly knocked out by their freaking attitudes they displayed towards singing. Laugh, laugh and laugh. This is what they are best at. They would laugh at the guys who are freaking hell stupid and dumb with those snnezing and crazy dance movements. It is NOT FUNNY!!! There is only 9 DAYS to SYF, and they freaking hell give me this kind of attitude! Some of them even show black face or impatience, i jus dun wish to mention their names. I am FED UP. I will do my best, i dun have the mood to care about the rest of them who still wish to remain in this "WHATEVER, I DONT GIVE A DAMN" de state. Now i know the fellings of the seniors last time who used to train us and hels sectionals every now an then. But i believe they will vomit blood if they knew the state of choir now. Well, i will stop here. enough of my anger venting.
After choir practice and sectional, Zelzel n me went librarty to return and borrow some books. Then we went to the Woodlands stadium to do homework and study. It is indeed a nice place to study, better than the regional library. Can admire nice scenery there too, watching the rain as they pitter and patter down on the grass patch and tiles. Sem and Gz also came along cos Zel called Sem to help her with Chemistry. But we ended up doing our own homework. I spent 2 hours to finish my composition and left lots of questions undone for math. Lazy lar...it was rainging very heavily though. Left the stadium at about 5.30...walked to the bus stop with Zel. sian lor...on the way back, i met Jason, a 20 years old, handsome, tall, yet childish guy. He is my mum's fren's son. he is currently working at Bugis Junction lor. He likes to talk crap with me. Stupid him, dun wanna sit my car home, walked home himself. Dumb kid. haha...by the way, I've cut my hair yesterday. The hairdresser nearly want to cut my hair short! Zel n Sem saw my hair and said it looked like auntie and very nerdy with the spectacles siax....haix...no choice lar, have to let it regrow again and then cut for a better hairstyle. haix...Monday go back school sure will be laughed at de. What ever lar. I happy can le, dun care how people looked at me! haha.....kk lar, late le gotta sleep le. Nitex...sweet dreams everyone!

Sports Carnival.

2007-04-05T21:28:00.000+07:00

It was a hectic day though. People crying and injured. I was abit sad lar, not expecting all this to happen. My class din managed to win much, but we had a great day interacting with the other classmates whom we seldom talked to. haha..for example there is wilson, bing liang, kelvin and hong rui they all. Me, sem and jieling had so much fun guessing lame riddles and gave them stupid riddles to guess too...It had been a long time since i've so fun chatting with frens...Many had been disppointed with the results of the relay. Some even injured and cried over it. It was just not worth. We had put in our best foot, no matter what the results are, we still must continue to have our "never die" spirit! K? Nothing much to comment on lar...very sian lor..oh ya before i forget, i had a bad sore throat yesterday and guess wad? I shouted and cheered too much, and now i am nearly speechless...haix..must take care of myself lor...Syf is just 12 days away. If something is gonna happen to me, Ms Choo and Chuan Whai will be the first ones to kill me...haha....everyone must jia you for SYF!!! ganbatte! aja aja fighting! wye.dit!

arh! exams are coming!

2007-04-03T19:16:00.001+07:00

Sorry for not blogging such a long time. heex...to lazy and too much work to do. Anyway, Ms Tan really CALLED my dad lol...haix....she told him tat i often doze off during her lesson. Den my dad very nice, explained to her tat i've to wake up very early in the morning and i dun really have enough sleep a day. She continued her crap and in the end she concluded by saying tat "Yr daughter sleeps in class." WTH...cant she jus stopped tat? My dad was abit pissed off by her. He nearly wanted to scream in the phone, telling her "Let her sleep lor, in that case..." HAHAHA...funny right? my dad was frustrated by her call obviously. Hence, now we are not sitting school bus anymore. My dad fetches us to the msia custom every morning so i could get another hour of sleep. My mum called my bus uncle to tell him tat we are not going to take his bus. My mum expected him to be shocked cos she called him on April's Fool Day! But he was so cold towards the call. We've been his 'customer' for nearly 10 years le lor. He ended up by saying "Orh okay lor. Bye." Just like tat. haix...so sad lor...he has been a nice bus uncle, unlike other uncles who spit vulgar language on you if u are late or something else. But he is quite flirty lar and abit horny too....*chuckles*
Okay, enough of tat. Now, my exam....oh my...only less than 1 month to my mid-year exams....cry.....due to the tight schedules of rehearsals for SYF, i rarely have time to revise my work. Furthermore, the exam will test even the sec 3 syllabus lor....damn lots of chapters sia....i gonna die of burning midnight oil...haha....my sis wanna stay at her fren's house which is near pasir ris...wad's the point lor....yox...wanted to stay at sem's...but dunno lar....see first bar....orh yar...boring focus study sia...kept doing papers with questions tat have been done before...gross lor....headache too....dunno when will this study sessions end...haix....jus have to zuo yi bu suan yi bu lor....tats all i tink...take care! and good luck for all ppl joining syf!

exams and syf....

2007-03-29T21:13:00.000+07:00

I changed my blogskin again! haha...just feel very bored and sianx lor.... anyway, these two weeks very busy and tired seh...this week the homework are piling up...and i am still sitting down here posting entry...actually wanted to do chemistry homework de....just too lazy to do...haix...i totally lose all the motivation to study...i even thought of going to M.I to study next year..hahaha...my frens were shocked lar...maybe i am just out of my mind...but i reconsidered it...actually it is also quite a nice choice...jus falls nicely between poly and jc..i am afraid i can cope with the stressful schedule in jc and subjects combinations....as for poly, i dun tink i am suitable for it lar...i dun even have any idea which course to go for...but most importantly it's my o lvl lar...haix...my classmates are scored very well for this class test....i failed 3 suns which includes english, combined humanities and my weakest sub, physics,...i topped for biology in the whole level and this is the only sub i am proud of...haha...higher chinese i still can make it...as for chemistry, i have to work hard enough to get at least a B3...maths have been always my weak point...but i still can cope with my add math..ele math is getting more complicated and tough...jus have to focus more...focus studies have started this week...and SYF competitions are just around the corner...so many stuffs going on at the same time...and there is only one month left to mid-year exams...i havent even revise a single bit of thing...i'm already half-dead i supposed...xin ni, chin fern and an qi have moved to spore and stayed together during school days...i am the only one who have to travel back and fro to spore...it's tiring if u have not tried it before...i am gone thru this for the past 10 years...but i am really really very tired of this....i ahd enough...it's either i move to spore or else i would have to score badly for my o lvl..i dun have time to prepare and focus on my weak points...i guess if this continues, i'll have to give up thinking about getting into a better jc...ms choo asked me what would i liked to get as a reward after syf be it whether we get gold anot....i told her...i want another year to study for my o lvl...of course it is just simply impossible...i am dreaming lar...haha...i seriously need a long break...or else i will break down any moment....well, i guess i've said enough...time for me to reflect and do hw...good luck to everyone who are performing for tml's concert at RP..including me! haha....best of luck....

Holidays...i doubt so...

2007-03-13T14:17:00.000+07:00

Well, my mum paid the broadband fees late so it was suspended for a week...haha...anyway, i'm in a holiday mood now...but still i have to return school for supplementary lesson....haix...choir camp is around the corner too...sianx....everyday see Ms Tan till wanna puke le...haix...tml is from 8 to 1pm....god knows if i can tahan till 1....without dozing off...haha...but i already expect this kind of life during march holiday...so envious those who went to Yun Nam n India for either CIP or exchange programme...sooooo good sia...
I am supposed to buy a handphone but due to some problem i cant le...haix...so i changed my mind to buying a new mp3...but not sure lar...cos my mum said maybe my dad would allow me to sign line together with a phone...yeah..really hope my dad allows....cant tahan my stupid phone le...
Yesterday i was one pathetic fellow who went to watch movie ALONE!!! haha....watched The Pursuit Of HappYness...quite a touching movie....That Fitri...really made my blood boils...she pang seh me last friday at cwp..she was supposed to treat me to a movie...she disappeared....today..again...din come to school even....oh my....actually i wanted to watch a movie alone again....thought i'm crazy bah...but tell you, it's quite a cool thing to watch movie alone...although it's abit lonely lar...but the silence is really solemnly wonderful....the peaceful atmosphere is the best thing i have sensed....
Oh ya..i 'm joining Campus superstar audition this saturday..haha...ppl who are free please come down to Toa Payoh HDB Hub to support me..thanks!!!i'm still looking for a suitable song to sing..i dun wanna be dropout like 2 yrs ago...i'm quite confident to get into the 2nd audition...must be more confident...haha...
I went to Xiangyi's blog and read her post on wad's the meaning of love and life....it was great and exactly wad i was tinking....wad she said really touched me...
This is part of the post that extracted out...hope xiangyi dun mind!
"what's the meaning of a relationship? what's the meaning of being in love? ain't relationships tiring? why do people still continue looking for a partner even after failing to continue their previous relationships? doesn't the pain stop people from looking for their 'love'? aren't they afraid to get another heartbreaking experience? why do they never stop looking for 'love'? do they really believe that there is really someone made for them somewhere on this planet? do they really believe in happily ever after? i thought i knew about 'love' very well.. but actually i know nothing at all.. the more relationships i get myself into.. the more confused i become.. is it really worth hurting yourself over and over again just to find the man you THINK is the one? is it really worth the heartache to like someone who will never like you? is that the truth of happiness? does 'the one' really exist or is it just a cycle passed down from generations before us? will a strong attraction be forever strong? or no matter how strong the attraction, it will fade away one day? is it really worth crying over a gone relationship? i personally find it more worth it crying over tv dramas.. maybe bcos im one who's afraid to love again..
what's the meaning of life? sometimes i thought it would have been better if nothing existed at all.. no humans, no trees, no animals, no planets, no galaxy.. we eat, we work, we cry, we laugh and we die.. sometimes i think that emotions are not necessary.. i wished all humans died.. and there will be no next generation of humans to suffer the meaning of life.. no sickness.. no cripples.. no work.. no stress.. and no emotion burdens.. but is it possible to have 'nothing' in this world? no.. not even your God.."
Copyright from www.simplequeenxiangyi.blogspot.com.

busy with tests

2007-03-01T18:49:00.000+07:00

haix...i just hate class tests...i'm left with biology and chinese test tml...i heard tat the biology test is going to be tough...haix...furthermore, the chinese test requires memorise notes...i am at a lost now...cry...i flunked my source-based questions for social studies...scored badly for chinese comprehension and ele math....i scored well for add math and the bio test previously...i scared my chem and physics...tink i gonna fail bah...haix...english i dun nid to worry much...got 23/30 gor sail test, have to see the summary's result now...but dun tink i will flunk lar...ooh yar...have to do a recount essay tml...haix....i'm damn busy lor...
There were rumours about Mrs Pang wanting to close down choir...haix...there are some obvious evidences to prove this...we had only 9 sec ones...can u believe this? even creative media has 15 sec ones...it's weird, dun u tink so? even my batch with only 7 classes could recruit 23 pupils in...something's wrong, something's gona happen bah...but no matter what, we still have to go on....strive for gold for SYF...no matter wad obstacles we have in front of us...we must overcome them...i dun wan Ms Choo to go...neither do i want to see the fall of choir in our hands....but i lost the confidence and almost all the passion...i guess i'm the one who is being left out bah....always alone...think alone, act alone, eat alone, shop alone....but i am used to this kind of life le....there are not much worries except for those in school....i wil get through this eventually...i strongly believe...
i dun have a goal yet...in wadeva i wan to do and where i would like to go for further studies...i'm like a clueless pig...haha...i' just going thru my life day by day with the same daily routine...wake up, sit bus, reach school, study, recess, study agian, cca, go home, bath, eat, do homework, sleep...everyday seemed to be repeating itself...i dunno how to change it...i dun find anything interesting in life...i lose the passion in everything now...maybe even studies....but the worse thing is..i dun even know wad more interests i have...i dunno wad to develop on......i'll just have to lead my life blindly...

My birthday...

2007-02-23T18:57:00.000+07:00

TODAY IS MY 17th BIRTHDAY!!!

haha..the moment i stepped into the school, i started looking for frens to give out the tokens...i almost gave everyone i knew...in the end all the candies were given, 2 bars of chocolates were left and a handful of hearts left...these are some photos...

*_candies i bought...

*_delicious chocolates...yumyum...

*_the 92 hearts which i folded....

well, i received quite alot of presents..thank you to everyone who bought me presents!!!

Jiamin bought me a chocolate mousse cake! It was delicious,man....i asked sherley and shurong, the other 2 bdae girls to join us...they were very paiseh lor...but i offered cakes to them lar...it seemed to be very selfish not to let them have a share...since we shared the same bdae...haha...i offered one to simin too..heeheee....Chuan whai n jieling they all bought me BoA's new album! wow..heard that there were 11 ppl who shared money to buy for me...XD

Hila gave me a CHIP soft toy! sooo cute sia..thanks! Hana gave me a blue colour sheep keychain...tot she would give me a piggy cos last year she did...haha...sherley gave me a tigger keychain n shurong bought me a cute kitty purse together with liping, charmaine,esther and tingting...thanks!Divya n junrong gave me a ferrero rocher choco...not forgeting to mention huiyi and siying who bought me a pair of nice earrings! thanks..cerlyn drew me a card too!haha...

After our chinese focus study, we went to eat pasta and shot neoprint...had a quite nice day! went to zel's house play mahjong too...won 2 rounds...mum bought me a cappucino mousse cake...wow...tink it gonna be delicious too! haha...

Before the cny, me and chuan whai went to do nail art diy at mac lor...i shot a photo of my nails though its abit blurr...sorry...enjoyed doing nail art leh...i did for my mum n my 2 sisters too..haha....fun though....

*_my pretty nails...

*_this is my personalised board which i can take note of due dates..haha...cute bah?

Well, tink tats all bah...have to go shower n eat dinner lor...den i will enjoy my bdae cake...bye..

finally i have been waiting for tis day for so long.....

2007-02-22T18:19:00.000+07:00

Tomorrow is my birthday le!!! Have been waiting for this day for so long le....haha...but anyway it would be still just another ordinary day with extraordinary frens to celebrate with me....i am expecting fun! haha...thank you my frens for preparing all this for me! haha.. special mention to Jiamin, Chuanwhai, Semantha, Yixin, Hazel, Cerlyn, Jieling and many more...tmr i will also be giving out chocolates n candies to my beloved frens...wow! Hope tmr will be a great day!

Valentine's day!

2007-02-14T19:28:00.000+07:00

Happy Valentine's Day! Well, i was expecting nothing from this
year...but the atmosphere was certainly wonderful in our our
school this year..Due to the Yun Nan trip for CIP, the students
who are going there had to raise funds of a sum of $5000 to buy
materials for building school n other necessaties for the people
there in Yun Nan...so they sold roses for 2 bucks each, self-made
cookies n brownies, and for those who wanna spread love thru
messages, 50 cents to put up ur message...Our committee suggested
to buy 10 roses each for our subject teachers which includes Miss
Tan, Mr Radha and many others...During the flag-raising ceremony,
Mdm Soh was giving some announcements when suddenly Chen Geng
stood up n gave one rose to Ms Tan who was busily marking
attendance,den Ms Tan was like so shocked n kept waving to him to
sit down...But too late, everyone saw except those sitting in
front who missed the good show...Everyone den cheered quite
loudly...Our vp was irritated obviously when she went up to d
podium n reprimanded us for cheering halfway thru the
announcements...said we din show any respect to the person
standing in front....lol...sem n me was like...duh, she's jealous
cos no one gave her roses......jus for laugh...but spilt our mood
lor...darn it...Liping was sweet den, she gave me n my classmates
folded straw hearts n we pinned it up on our hair cos Liping
started the trend...even Kenneth. Zhan Peng n Zhi Kun joined in
the fun...haha....we were like a bunch of matchmakers...tats wad
Lex commented...lol....When the recess bell rang, the whole lot
of us stood outside 4/7e cos we wanted to present roses for Ms
Tan...everyone shouted "HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!" n Kenneth
presented the roses for Ms Tan n evryone start cheering...Ooh
before i forget to mention my beloved besties who gave me
chocolates, be it an expensive one or a budget one...haha...Chuan
Whai, Wan Yu, Jie Ling, Kai Ting, Yue Wen, Hana, Sheryl, Yi
Xin....n ZEL zel who gave me a Valentine's kiss...muackx..thks!
Haha....i ate some of d choco during recess n dunno 4 wad reason
i went back to d class...n i missed a GREAT show!!! JIALE bought
25 ROSES for his crush, MARILYN form sec3...n he presented the
roses to her in front of everyone in the middle of the canteen!!!
I MISSED IT!!! omg...so sweet sia...if only i was there! but i
still can imagine the touching moment...After recess was add-
math, RAdha was of course, shocked when he received the roses
from Thrina...lol...den he was trying to get our attention back
cos he wanna teach...den he looked to the back n said, "Tat girl
behind..." Zhi kun raised his head n Radha gasped, "He's not a
girl arh?" Haha...everyone started to laugh
madly...goodness...does tat heart makes him look like a girl or
he jus seemed to look more like a girl even without the
heart...No offence! Radha said, "The heart made tat boy more
appealed to a girl...." sia la... During choir practice, Wan yu was sitting beside me n we had
quite alot of fun talking n singing..haha...halfway thru, she
asked me an add-math ques...den i sang n did the ques at the same
time lor.....haix...i need to put in more effort for my math
leh...well...this year's Valentine was much more better than last
year although i din receive presents...but still very glad to
receive the chocolates from my girlfrens!!! by the way, i'm in
the midst of preparing birthday tokens for my frens on my
birthday...haha....in return of the Valentine's day
chocolates...hope next year will be a more lovingly Valentine's
day!gotta go....bye..

sianx

2007-02-13T17:45:00.001+07:00

Tml is Valentine's day...Chuan whai asked me what am i going to expect for tml...Nothing. I told her tat..serious lor...i am expecting nothing...only her Merci chocolates...haha...how greedy can i be...The least i could i expect is my birthday...I am totally giving up on chinese new year cos of the work load my teachers have givan us....wa lau, it's absolutely mad...they tink we no need to celebrate chinese new year seh....wadever...tink i have nowhere to go bai nian too...relatives all separated in many different parts of msia n spore...seldom go bai nian so my hongbao money is very little de...speaking of money, ms choo haven give us our pay lor...still waiting leh..2 months le lor....so slow de...i have to rely on my pay to buy guidebooks and buying presents n treating ppl to seoul garden de....wad's more, i want to change my phone!!! tat colin hor, changed phone before me seh...feel like killing him lor...haha
There's one lame person who tinks tat he/she has the authority to insult me...but i dun mind he/she wanna spam me..since my tagboard so leng qing...thanks leh! haha...sometimes when u wanna dui fu tis kind of blog trespassers, must treat them nicely....becos u never know who they are! save trouble to scold them lar...dun wanna lei ji bad deeds...they have nothing to do mah....let them waste their time on our tagboard..anyway, to them, my tagboard is a chu qi tong mah....for them to relieve themselves from stress de...i very generous de....welcome aboard!
Lastly, wanna wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day!

sianx

2007-02-13T17:45:00.000+07:00

valentine's day de me...

2007-02-12T21:01:00.000+07:00

Haha...think i really gonna have 7 years of bad luck? I nearly choked on a candy while i was singing...cos i breathe too hard?! The whole candy just fell into throat...the problem is i dunno whether i dropped into the oesophagus or the windpipe...cry...zel helped me to pat my back..it dropped into one of the pipes...tats wad i could rmb...i was so scraed lor...den i felt pain around my chest area...i kept coughing lor...but nothing came out...haix...but the pain deceased after a few while...after choir had dismissed...i stepped out of the school foyer n i wanted to take out my wallet..in the end the mirror in my pocket fell n smashed itself onto the ground...into 8 pieces not 7, mind u...but den...sumone mumbled.."tats so bad luck..." I broke out in cold sweat....Oh my god...Zel said i will have bad luck continuously for 7 years!!! But i dun believe in this kind of supertitious thing...
Haix...i met my sis on the way home n she dragged me along with one of her frens to buy Valentine's day de present....lol...btw, she patched with her boyfren....haix...i am jus one lonely soul.....still drag me to see wad i dun wan to see...sad....ppl got flowers, chocolate..i dun have...cry...haha...sorry, i'm being sarcastic again.....lol...sianx lor...tml still have to sing for the lunchtime performance...as a program of Valentine's day.....sia lar.....i no mood to sing leh....Valentine's day coming....Chinese new year coming...but the excited atmosphere doesnt influence me even a single bit....haix...nvm i still got my own life to live on...but its no a big deal either....i got choir practice on Valentine's day..ppl trying to skip school yet i cant bear to leave school...haha.....missed my William kor kor...my Msia choir members...my old classmates in primary school....my seniors from rss....new frens made last dec...and so much more...
But there's much more important to be done...O level is the big thing now...I only left 252 days to O level leh...i dun tink i haf enough time.....i am buying guidebooks tml ba..if not it'll be very late leh...must jiayou lor...must prove to ppl tat even i stay in msia also can get good grades de...gambatte neh!!!

Do i have enough time?

2007-02-11T10:54:00.000+07:00

I've started to upate my blog more frequently or else ppl will cum n kill me..haha..time flies, glides pass us unknowingly...do i really have enough time?
He din make it in the end...i dun know should i feel sad for him...but one thing i'm sure of is...i feel tat it's my fault...for tis reault...i blame myself...i was the one who was stubborn, not appreciative, always complaining...i jus wanna i'm really sorry for everythng...sorry...if it's not me, u could have made it...u really can...i dunno how to face him.........i felt so guilty..i can never make it up for him ever in my life...sorry......

我从来不知道代价竟然那么严重, 这是在惩罚我们吗? 我却什么都不能做, 对不起...

Yesterday had choir practice again, den we sang for mdm ng as a rehersal for tues' performance...well it went quite badly...the gals sounded better than d guys...they were weak though....we really have to buck up lor...
After tat, went cwp with zel...shop around n she bought lunch for her bro den she went off le...me still had to wait for Hongwei lor...saw Chuanwhai n the rest of d acc members at mac..sat down with them n sneaked some french fries from Azri..haha..sorry abt my itchy hand n mouth....lol..Hongwei took such a long time to reach..wonder wad was he doing before meeting me..den we bought take-aways from mac n went to Tingshien's house..his mum was cleaning the house lor...quite messy de...we went into his bedroom n started eating...Tingshien fussed abt his room which had been cleaned n told us not to dirty his room....did our homework on a majong table..Tingshien n hongwei are always fighting over their answers for either their homeworks or some other stuffs lar...den i'll always be the one sitting there watching them as they argue...haha...very exciting though...but the both of them are just grest frens lar...willing to help me in my homework...thanks alot to them! But i still have to treat them to either Seoul garden or Sakae sushi to appreciate n thank them...if i can get my pay by my birthday..haha...after abt 3hrs of doing homework, Hongwei suggested to play basketball....den we left a little portion of our work undone off we went to the court...but Tingshien's ball was deflated lor...borrowed a pump from his neighbour..haha...n the both of them started to step on the pump...nearly spoiled it lor...haha..we walked to the court n found tat all d courts were booked...sianx...there was one filled with young secondary pupils, some wore their sch's shirt..Nanhua i tink...den they noe i from rss cos i was wearing d class tshirt -_-" they had 4 balls n they just shot into the net like nobody's business...i stood aside..so afraid that the balls would hit me..Tingshien threw the ball at me n asked me to shoot...lol...i threw it back to him..i really dun wanna injure myself...then the kids went off le...we three started playing lor...they threw shots to decide who to patch with me to play a game...lol..it was Hongwei first...i ran abit, blocking Tingshien from getting a shot but to no avail lar...he so tall...Hongwei shot 5 before Tingshien did..then they took turns to play with me lar..Stupid Tingshien...he told me to go hug Hongwei to stop him from scoring -_-" lol...these ppl are mad...really had fun palying with them lor...after tat we went back to Tingshien's house..i continued doing my owrk n they slacking lor..His mum cooked dinner for us n they wanted to go out to shop..His mum is really naggy lor...tingshien bobian have to reply her by saying "emm" "orh" "eh na"....haha...but she really doting Tingshien lor...so xingfu....in the end after we finished our dinner, i offered to wash the dishes cos i bu hao yi si lar..must help to do something ma...den Tingshien said cant tell his mum tat i was d one who washed the plates...lol......they had a game on chinese chess..i sat there watching them till i very sian lor....in the end Tingshien lost lor...den me n Hongwei went home....back to Jb...there was a very heavy trafic jam..i waited 1 hour for my parents...i leaned against the pole n nearly fell asleep lor...the wind was blowing so strongly some more....brrrr....

I am not expecting anything from Valentine's day lor...no mood at all...still must sing for our fellow schoolmates...haix...
Dun tink haf enough time to revise lor..minus the time i waste on transport and on sleep and school....there isn't much time left for preparing...i am very scared now...want to move also cannot...if i moved in May...i still nid to adaot to d environment...there would be much time left...thats y the best its to move it by march...but i dunno lar..let fate decides everything bah....having class tests this few weeks...have to study hard lor...Chinese new year is jus next week..hope i can get more angbaos...haha...well...enjoy!

2007-02-09T20:14:00.001+07:00

The BIG day is finally over! Some people rejoiced, some cried...some dunno how to react, some just cant be bothered...it doesnt matter how they score..People come back with unproper attire, dyed hair...haix... Well, back to the point, I got an A1 for my chinese!!!! YEAH!!!! Before we got our results, we were there panicking cos our teacher told us tat only abt 70% of us got distinctions....tis means tat only 27 people managed to get As...the rest 13 of them cant make it...haix...feel sorry for them...The seniors really did very well this time...about more than 95% eligible for admission to junior colleges...congrats! Firstly, i want to mention VERA, the TOP student in our school with a score of 9 points! GOGOGO! Next, congratulations to SEAN! One of the top students in Swiss Cottage with a score of 8 points...excluding 4 bonus points!!! Both of these top students are from AJC!!!! JIAYOU OOH!!! haha...continuing with the honour list....Wei Shing from St. Joseph's scored a 13 points!!! My former choir president, Pei Qi did us proud with a score of 10! Forget to mention tat Vera is my senior in choir too! And she was from my section, SOP2! HIP HIP HOORAY!!! Next is Jun Yang, with a nice score of 16! My bestie, Jason from Woodgrove got a 14 point but he wanna go poly...sianx...My very hyper-active senior, Yujing scored 11! Well, congrats to those who scored well! All the best in yr JC or Poly school life! And remember to stay in contact!

haix...

2007-02-08T22:11:00.000+07:00

Haha...it's very pek chek to upload photos onto d blog.....esp when my bloody computer is very slow one....haix...took me nearly 3 hours to post this two posts...lol....very frustrated now...and furthermore.....tml is a BIG day for me....but a GIGANTIC day for the rest of the graduates...lol wad kind of adjectives i've used???? wadeva, just pray hard that i can get an A1!!! chinese mah...should be chicken feet de lar...speaking of chinese, tat friday we did a mock paper and whai whai copied some of the comprehansion ques from me cos she lazy to do lor.....in the end she got the highest...wad the...i got 6 marks lesser than her...its crazy...haha...whai, i din meant anything bad...hehe...but back to the point...those who got a B3 and below have to DROP HMT!!! tats wad mdm leow said last year lar....haix...those people would had wasted 3 years studying hmt lor...haix...emmm, back to my room....after the cleaning, my room seemed to be more 'like a room' le...haha....but there's a little part of the wall which is still unpainted..........my posters are now all resting under my bed, waiting the day of de-hibenating...haha....i've got loads of S.H.E's , Energy's , F.I.R's..very nice one de...my favourite ia the largest one which pictures S.H.E...given by Edwin on my last yr's bdae...tats very sweet of him...haha...and now photos...

`spick and span bah? haha...all efforts are contributed by my parents de lor....so wei da of them! applause!_*

`the windchime tat was given by Sean...abit rusty liao la...tink got 6 yrs le bah?_*

`my bao bei displays and figurines.....photos too...neat bah?_*

`wow....such neat n tidy desktop....wooo....so happy sia...*

`my wonderful collection of books....comics, novels...assessment books....etc..._*

My "new" room.... ^^

2007-02-08T18:20:00.001+07:00

Well...i had cleared my room on saturday and sunday...lol...it was in a very horrible state...after living in tis room for about 8 years, finally...i waited for this day for a very long time liao...i am so happy! White-washing...haha...i yearned for very long le...I uploaded some photos to show how bad was the condition of my room before cleaning and after cleaning...enjoy!

` me with a mask to protect myself from dust, but well...i still contracted a terrible runny nose...lol_*

`see? such a mess...the cupboard and shelves had been moved away...clearing my tables....._*

`red plastic containers for me to keep my stuffs while my room was in the progress of white-washing..._*

`heaps of bags and files....lol..._*

`the shelf tat was moved to d kitchen..eith all my books stuffed inside..._*

`box filled with my stuffs..._*

`walls of graffiti.....haha...this is the biggest reason for white-wash my room..._*

It is horrible, isn't it? This is an accumulation of me n my sibling's abstract art..
haha...we wrote here and there...and everywhere...lol....next post will be the photos after clearing n white-washing....keep updated!

I cried again...

2007-02-03T20:24:00.000+07:00

In the end, I still cried...It's not because I'm lonely...It's jus tat I cant bear it anymore...I dunno wad's inside me tat made me feel tat emptiness...It's like nothing can ever fill it...I'm so afraid, afraid tat one day I'll just lose myself...i've had been telling myself not to cry...I've broke up with him for 5 months...and yet, I didn't even drop a tear for him...not ever again...but i cried n shedded tears because of a few unbearingly touching novels...maybe I'm just alternatively using novels as an excuse to cry bah...i dunno...
Its very frustrating tat the internet is loading slowly like it has the time on Earth forever......cant stand it...sometimes i jus shut it down n leave it alone..
I've been quite hot-tempered these few days...cant seem to control myself...i was discussing the issue on moving to Spore when my dad came back...Mybe cos of his tiredness he started splutting nonsense and insults on anything...Then I asked him about moving to Spore...he barked at me, saying tat he dun have tat much of money to let me stay in Spore...He's just talking crap lar...he's got 2 cars, a lorry of his own in Spore for working purposes, a motorbike, a semi-detached house and he has a bloody hell amout of money for my mum to spend on her clothes, cosmetics and facial sets...Yet he can still say tat he dun have money...He even said tat we collapsed never mind de...if he collasped den we'll die with him....although its correct in a sense tat we need him to support us but i jus think tat he's freaking hell too much! Its not tat i forced him to let me stay, I'm jus giving him a suggestion and myself time to do revision n homework...Wad's wrong with tat? If he really has abit of problem with the financial part, I can dun mind...but must he speak in tat way? Its always his volcanoe-temper tat spoils our harmony...Since when I was small...he never change...There's forever a communication gap between daughters and fathers...No offence but maybe this applies to me only bah...haix...Wad's worse, he siad tat if i so capable i should go and work n pay for my own school fees...wad the hell...He told me he has no money to send me to university...Fine den, I'll make sure I get such poor results so tat i no need to fuss about whether I wanna go to a JC or Polytechnic.......As how he wishes me to do...
Sometimes I dunno wad is the purpose of studying so much? Waste money to go college and university and get a certificate or degree...There's tons of people in the society who are undergraduates without jobs...So who can explain this to me? why waste money in the first place? and waste time? Its enough...I'll just do the best i can....I dun wan to have any more tuitions , remedials....Its not going to help neither...I wan to give up...I'm not tat capable to earn money n support myself at this age...Worse still I'm still single after 5 months...If i'm attached I may be able to rely on my boyfriend if he' a rich one...haha....
So jus a small advice to those studying out there, if your parents have money, you better jolly well study well and at least get a certificate....if not you're wasting your own time n your parents' money...so learn to cherish everything you owned...
Its too late to say anythign now lar...Jus walk one step count one step lol...i also dunno which path i'll be taking...jus hope tat i can meet frens with true sincere hearts...and of course a guy tat i rely on for a lifetime.........asap.............
Tats all folks! Sorry if u fond it irritating tat i keep changing blogskin cos i'm jus sick of things very quickly nowadays...I'll settle down my emotions asap...bear with me..thank you! Remember to tag....flood it if u wan...But no vulgars and insults! See ya soon!

*me_2_euu*

Farewell!

Stress accumulating

School life

First day of school

HMS FOC

The end of torture

Enrolment period

I HATE PICKPOCKETS!

WRATH

Lesser words

Happy Birthday to me!

Eve of the special day

Valentine's Day

Carefree

Chinese New Year!

Busy!

Shopping Again!!!

Shopping

Alone

Goodbyes

Personality tests

After the release

Results release!

A Complicated love story

Getting busy

Lost in the world of reality

Open House

Awaiting job

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Meaningless life

Reflections of 2007

My Christmas Present!

Rotting at home

Merry Christmas ^^

Lonely Christmas

Slacking at home!

Spending money..

WORK WORK & WORK!!!

S.H.E Rocks!

Boredom

What are friends for?

Slacking isn't as great as i've thought.

Meeting new friends

Shopping!

Chalet

PROM!

Leaving

Forgotten.

男人都是同类吗?

CELEBRATION STARTS NOW!!!

Midnight confessions.

Disappointment

Green tea.

Sian..

Sorry...

Cherish your gains.

Unconditioned love.

wad should i do?

Sorry.

Long-lost post

sorry...

holidays sucks!

Back At Home.

Emptiness.

Disappointed.

Stress-free

S.H.E !!!

I can FLY!

Insane.

Stressed up...

Tired but honoured to be...

Laziness kills me...

恋爱为何物?

Touched....

chinese post.

It is finally over...

Tomorrow is SYF!

Spendthrift,is tat me?

Obsessions...

me_2_euu